Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
my boyfriend and i have been dating for 3 years. Long story short, he had two paths in life, and luckily chose the right one, with my help. he is now in the military and recently left. before he left i found out that he cheated on me. i had suspected this before, but i did not expect that he would lie to me about it. that was what hurt the most. and then when i made him tell me the details of what he could remeber happend, i felt so sick. he had sex with another girl,he claims he stopped "her" "like 5 minutes into it". he says they were drinking and he cant remember why he did it , and she initiated it, which i somewhat belive. but his excuse was they were drinking and he just really wanted sex and she started it all. he cant remember where i was, or why he didnt just call me if his needs were that bad? honestly. the part that hurts me is he lied to me about it, straight to my face, and each day after his little encounter, he acted like nothing happened, until i confronted him about it. we havent really gotten the chance to talk because he left about three days after i found this out. i really dont know what to do. should i forgive him and try to move on, even tho it is the hardest thing in the world to me, because each day it seems to be all i think about? or is that just it? am i thinking and dwelling too much? i really dont know what to do....
The choice is up to you.
Do you love him enough to forgive him and work it out. Or are you so upset that you feel this can't be fixed.
The fact that you wrote in suggests that you don't want to forgive him. Otherwise you would just forgive him and not ask.
Another approach would be to tell him you are thinking it over and then do so for at least a month. It's possible you might find out something new about him during this time out.
Good luck! George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com
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