Someone told me they thought they saw him with someone else...

Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Female
I haven't seen my boyfriend since last Friday&I thought everything was getting better but yesterdayr someone told me he was seen wearing make-up at the movie theatre,hanging out with his ex that broke us up back in November.I was completely hurt when I heard this&couldn't stop crying because every guy I've been with has hurt me&I finally thought i found someone who wouldn't.I really trust him&he is NOT the type of MAN to wear make-up.he'd usually make some joke about punching "black-eyed emo kids in the face&beating the crap out of them so they'd REALLY bleed",so it probably wasn't him. I wanted to call yesterday but I couldn't hold my composure long enough. I know honestly genuinely cares about my feelings&is always the one who's told me everything'll be alright even when we were broken up, and he's supported me though everything I do. I feel as if I know him well enough to know that it probably wasn't him, because the person clamed to have seen him and her from afar. I've been one of his best friends since the beginning on grade 7, and we've been together for 1 year and 6 months. I'm pretty sure I know how he acts.I don't mind him hanging out with his ex or anything, since I still hung out with him at school during some break-up time. My gut feeling is saying that he didn't... but I'm not happy about it considering that the person told all these other people and so everything expects us to be breaking up soon, which only makes me more edgy. I was too scared to ask for more details. I want to hear the truth from him, and not have it told by someone else who thought they saw them standing around.

I'm 99% sure that he is not cheating on me. But I don't know how to cope with not being able to speak with him in the meantime, because he said he might not be at home until after the 4th of July. And it actually makes no sense. they day before the person claimed they might've seen them, me and him were closer than ever, we had a bonding day and all, describing how we'd keep in touch for the summer and how we'd make all these plans...and I really do trust him...I doubt he could go from restless-happy-loving-caring to a completely different type of person that he highly dislikes and whines about all the time...and a big ass on top of that.

Every guy I've been with has hurt me to such a horrible point...with cheating issues and whatnot. I have a very low self-esteem. He has left me for that girl once, but he did it because he didn't want to end up hurting me and himself by going on in a relationship where he'd always be thinking about someone else while he knew that I genuinely loved him. I knew w were in hgih school, and wanted to give him a chance to experience other things. as long as it made him happy, no matter how much it hurt me. He came back to me because he said he realised his feelings for me were stronger all along, and that no matter how hard he tried he could never picture her the way he did with me. She also treated him like a dog and spazzed out if they were apart for an hour. He's the only one who ever gave a damn about what happened to me after the relationship, and who I've remained great friends with. I don't want to fall to pieces again. not with him...he's been such a major part of my life for a very long time.

How can I cope in the meantime, or resolve this gently? And if he does happen to be cheating, what do I do..? Please help! I just really need some outsider advice! Thank you so much...




RomanceClass.com Advice
The way to cope is to realize that it wasn't him at all in make-up.

That doesn't sound like him at all. And especially after the day you had bonding.

Hold off on your feelings until you have a talk with him and find out what is really going on.

You know how things get mixed up when you get them second hand.

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com





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