Romantic Forums! Get the answers you seek quickly and easily! If you can't find what you need
here amongst our tens of thousands of tips and questions, be sure to Post in our Romantic Forum!
We've got over 9,800 members ready to give you a hand!
A Love Quote
Love has nothing to do with what you are expecting to get - only with what you are expecting to give - which is everything. -- Katharine Hepburn

His Ex Still Calls My Boyfriend

Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Female
My ex and his girlfriend were together for 2 years. He broke up with her when she did not want the relationship to end. It has been almost a year since their break up, but she still calls him consistently, and because he feels guilty about breaking her heart he won't stop talking to her.

Is it unreasonable for me to not want him to continue the friendship with her?, especially since he doesn't tell me about it when she calls? Or do I need to insist that he not talk to her and for him to focus on our relationship now? I am having a VERY hard time dealing with this, since I feel like it is a constant underlying problem. PLEASE HELP!

RomanceClass.com Advice
Let me take first things first here. That has got to be the most meaningless break-up reason I've ever heard. He left her because she didn't want to be left?? Don't you want him to stay with you? So does that mean he is planning on leaving you? If that's really what he told her (and you), no wonder why she is having trouble believing him and moving on.

He really has to be HONEST about this past relationship. Obviously guys don't just abandon girls because they want the relationship to keep going. What guys are LOOKING for is a girl that wants to be in a relationship. He left because something made him unhappy about the relationship. He obviously wanted to be with someone that wanted him. He had that. So that wasn't the problem. He needs to tell *her* what really was the issue, and tell you. If he hasn't learned from his past problems, he's just going to make them all over again.

That being said, most people I know that break up then stay friends at least casually. The best relationships are between best friends who date. It would really be a shame if all those great friendships just vanished because the couple didn't end up being good romantically. On the other hand, it's his job to make sure she doesn't cross from being a friend to being a distraction in your relationship. Yes, he can care about her feelings. That's quite nice! But his primary duty is to your relationship. So that always needs to come first. Also, his duty to her as a friend is to help her move on. By supporting her all the time, in essence he draws her attentions away from finding a new boyfriend.

It's as if a mother has a son that always clings to her when they go to the playground. Yes, she wants to take care of her son and keep him safe. But if her son is going to grow and learn and become a happy person, he needs to learn to make new friends, to try new things and to become an independent individual. So yes she supports him, but she also weans him off of her, and lets him learn to go talk to other kids, to try out the swing and to take those risks. That's part of her job.

-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com

Visitor Submitted Responses
Our RomanceClass visitors have chimed in with thoughts on this question and answer. Click on a link below to read what their solutions are!

Forget ex

Add RomanceClass  to Twitter Add RomanceClass  to Facebook Add RomanceClass  to MySpace Add RomanceClass  to Del.icio.us Digg RomanceClass+ Add RomanceClass  to Yahoo My Web Add RomanceClass  to Google Bookmarks Add RomanceClass  to Stumbleupon Add RomanceClass  to Reddit

Speak Your Mind - Share your Thoughts on this Question!

All Advice in the category - Jealousy Issues

Browse our Answer Database
- Browse Answers by Question Category
- Browse Answers by Age Group
- Browse Answers by Date of Response

Please read through the advice on this site before you Submit your Own Question! We have thousands of pages of valuable advice that can immediately help you with your situation.

Sparkly Irridescent Glitz Gel

Going to a party or special event? What to feel special no matter what you're doing? Roll on some glitz! Perfect for adding a special bit of sparkle to your day or evening.

Buy Glitz Gel at EclecticLady.com

Bookmark this site so you can reference it any time you need romantic / relationship info in the future!

Add Romance+Class+Website+ to Twitter Add Romance+Class+Website+ to Facebook Add Romance+Class+Website+ to MySpace Add Romance+Class+Website+ to Del.icio.us Digg Romance+Class+Website+ Add Romance+Class+Website+ to Yahoo My Web Add Romance+Class+Website+ to Google Bookmarks Add Romance+Class+Website+ to Stumbleupon Add Romance+Class+Website+ to Reddit


Follow Me on Pinterest

Romantic Tshirts, Bags, Mugs and More!

Love is Patient
Love is Patient ...
Deeply Loved
Deeply Loved ...
Random Kindness
Random Kindness ...

These are just a small selection - Visit the RomanceClass Shop!

Join This Newsletter!

RomanceClass on Facebook

Join This Newsletter!

Past Issues

| About RomanceClass | Advertising | Privacy Policy | Submit a Suggestion |
All content copyright 2013 Minerva WebWorks LLC. All rights reserved.

this site is for amusement only - professional advice is not being rendered

Irish Wedding