logo


Romantic Forums! Get the answers you seek quickly and easily! If you can't find what you need
here amongst our tens of thousands of tips and questions, be sure to Post in our Romantic Forum!
We've got over 9,800 members ready to give you a hand!
A Love Quote
Commit yourself wholeheartedly and unconditionally to the most important people in your life. --Brian Tracy



My Husband has Lost Interest in Sex



Visitor's Question from a 51-60 year old Female
My husband is the love of my life. We are in our fifties and been together 10 years. For the first few years we had the most amazing sex life, we couldn't keep our hands off each other. But for the past 4 years he has been impotent and for the past 6 months he has no desire to even cuddle me, and he has stopped saying he loves me unless I drag it out of him. He has high BP, and sleep apnoea. He works very hard, and is also upset that he cannot make love. Viagra makes him sick.

In January he suggested that I find someone else for sex. I yearn for the old physical relationship we have. I have met a man who is in a similar situation to mine, he and I have met for lunch and coffee, and he is very very keen to see me...says he thinks about me all the time, and has to control himself not to phone me or try to see me every day. We haven't had sex yet, but we have discussed it, and both want to....except I feel nervous and sick thinking about what I am doing, maybe I am risking my relationship with my husband...

he SAID go and get a lover but saying it may be different to his reaction if I told him that I have! I don't want to rub his nose in his inability to satisfy me. If only he could cuddle me I think I could cope, but he just doesn't seem to want any physical contact. I am not ugly, still have a good body, men still find me attractive.




RomanceClass.com Advice
A lot of older men are in his situation. It can be extremely frustrating. It's of course frustrating for the woman who is now "abandoned". He probably would enjoy cuddling but because he feels so frustrated and bad about not being able to please you, even cuddling with you reminds him of that and makes him feel badly too.

I would NOT cheat - that never makes things better. What I would do is hook up for a couples' counselling session. Go in and talk about it and talk about - with a third person present - the idea of an external relationship. See if it really is a honest offer or something he said out of guilt. If it's a honest offer and he agrees to this guy, then that is an open relationship. People do get through open relationships but it has to be planned VERY carefully for it to work, it isn't something you should jump into without his knowledge. You never know though - maybe with some real discussion about the issue, he will become more opening to cuddling, and that might be enough.

You have to keep in mind the very real danger that if you begin being close to another man, you'll damage your connection with your husband and end up divorced. The whole point of monogamy is to prevent that very situation from happening. "Casual Sex" often changes over time - and something you feel is innocent to start will become destructive very quickly.

-- from Lisa
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com




Visitor Submitted Responses
Our RomanceClass visitors have chimed in with thoughts on this question and answer. Click on a link below to read what their solutions are!

Prepare yourself
User Submitted Response from a 21-30 year old Female

Add RomanceClass  to Twitter Add RomanceClass  to Facebook Add RomanceClass  to MySpace Add RomanceClass  to Del.icio.us Digg RomanceClass+ Add RomanceClass  to Yahoo My Web Add RomanceClass  to Google Bookmarks Add RomanceClass  to Stumbleupon Add RomanceClass  to Reddit
 


Speak Your Mind - Share your Thoughts on this Question!

All Advice in the category - Kissing / Intimacy

Browse our Answer Database
- Browse Answers by Question Category
- Browse Answers by Age Group
- Browse Answers by Date of Response



Please read through the advice on this site before you Submit your Own Question! We have thousands of pages of valuable advice that can immediately help you with your situation.
Advertisement


Sparkly Irridescent Glitz Gel

Going to a party or special event? What to feel special no matter what you're doing? Roll on some glitz! Perfect for adding a special bit of sparkle to your day or evening.

Buy Glitz Gel at EclecticLady.com




Bookmark this site so you can reference it any time you need romantic / relationship info in the future!

Add Romance+Class+Website+ to Twitter Add Romance+Class+Website+ to Facebook Add Romance+Class+Website+ to MySpace Add Romance+Class+Website+ to Del.icio.us Digg Romance+Class+Website+ Add Romance+Class+Website+ to Yahoo My Web Add Romance+Class+Website+ to Google Bookmarks Add Romance+Class+Website+ to Stumbleupon Add Romance+Class+Website+ to Reddit


 

Follow Me on Pinterest


Romantic Tshirts, Bags, Mugs and More!

Love is Patient
Love is Patient ...
Deeply Loved
Deeply Loved ...
Random Kindness
Random Kindness ...

These are just a small selection - Visit the RomanceClass Shop!

Join This Newsletter!


 
RomanceClass on Facebook




Join This Newsletter!

Past Issues





| About RomanceClass | Advertising | Privacy Policy | Submit a Suggestion |
All content copyright 2013 Minerva WebWorks LLC. All rights reserved.

this site is for amusement only - professional advice is not being rendered

Irish Wedding