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All love that has not friendship for its base, Is like a mansion built upon the sand. --Ella Wheeler Wilcox

She Likes Me - Not as a Boyfriend

Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
I met this girl through through a friend about 5 months ago.We have been friends since then,an i told her i realy like her very much.When i told her how i felt she told me she likes being with me but does not want a b/f.We she comes to visite me at home and we spend time together,we kiss all the time,she calls me her huny and stuff like that,she said she enjoys being with me a lot,but yet she does not want me as a b/f.I like this girl very much and I even told her to be straight forward with me but she always told me we just gonna be friend.A few days ago my best friend started talking to her on the net and told her to stop srewing around with me,becuase he saw her with another guy at the club and he was all over her and he did not realy like it becuase he thinks she is not being fair.he told her to start acting like an immature girl and make up her mind on what she wants,and stop playing around with my me.she got angry thinking it was me,an started saying she does not want to see me anymore becuase i am being rude to her and that i should not call her house again, and than she has beeing looking for a way to tell me not to cal her anymore and that she does not want a guy like me,becuase ma best friend told her she is not like she is anything special.I realy like this girl and do not want things to end this way,what should i do.

RomanceClass.com Advice
You need to look at things honestly here. You have been pressuring this girl for months and she tells you no. It's not like she even had to take any action to become your girlfriend. All she had to do is say "OK" or "we can try it". Instead she kept saying NO. And now you know that she has been out clubbing and is interested in other guys. So obviously it's not that she's sterile or wants to be a nun. She likes you - she doesn't want to date you.

Your friend was unfair to claim she was being immature. She has told you clearly what she wants. You just aren't listening to it. If you really couldn't handle her just as a friend and this was a torment to you, then maybe it's best if she stays away for a while. It might be time for you to start considering other girls to date, if you do want to date a girl. Pinning your hopes on this one girl who has told you repeatedly she's not interested just isn't a good idea.

-- from Lisa
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com

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