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The quality of love and the duration of a relationship are in direct proportion to the depth of the commitment by both people to making the relationship successful. -- Brian Tracy

Maybe he doesn't want to get married

Visitor's Question from a 41-50 year old Female
My boyfriend and I of four years are very much in love with each other when we end our phone calls we say "I love you". When he has to go home we both give each a very passionate and hard kiss and say I love you. My boyfriend will even give me three four pecks as he is walking out he door. He is divorced four years as well. He has a sixteen year old son in his custody. The mother of the son left on her own after a marriage of 25 yrs my boyfriend. I have only met his son. My boyfriend says his family knows of our relationship with me only his son does not know of our relationship. His son only knows his dad and I are friends. Yes we are intimately involved and everything is great. He has told me he is not ready for marriage just yet. One day he says when the time is right for us both we will know it. He is very affectionate with me and has met my sister. My parents are both deceased so he never got to meet them. He says he wished he had know them. The stories I have told him about my parents make him teary eyed. He says he wished he had the chance to know them. He always apologizes if he cannot see me because of his son's needs. He says he cannot promise anything to me now regarding a marriage. How long does a divorce man need? He says his son will be on his on in two years he will be 18yrs old. He signed an agreement with the court he will not be responsible for his son after 18yr. He said he would like to introduce me to his father but I have not met him yet? I have not been married before.This is his first marriage and divorce. I am 47yrs old my boyfriend is 51 yrs old. Any advise for us? signed, HOPEFUL

RomanceClass.com Advice
Sounds like things are going very smoothly. Your boyfriend should be open with his son about his relationship with you. No reason for secrets. You have been going together for four years so it is reasonable for you to ask him more about his thoughts on marriage. Is he suggested that when his son turns 18 he will marry you? You have the right to have some sort of solid response on marrying. On the other hand, your existing relationship is a good one and you don't want to mess it up by being too demanding about marriage. Perhaps he just doesn't want to get married again. How would you react to that? Consider these things and then proceed with caution.

Good luck,

Happy holidays!

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com

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