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Love is, above all, the gift of oneself. --Jean Anouilh

Flirting with a married guy

Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
The advice I would like to know is after you've read my story do you think that this is harmless fun or is it something that could possibly turn into more and should be stopped?? I am currently 5 years out of high school and through my 9-12th grade high school years I developed alittle crush on a teacher that I had. He was also a good friend too don't get me wrong. He was my teacher, a coach and I even babysit for him and his wife during that time. I am one of those kinds of people that gets picked on all the time because I'm soo good at taking it and he would tease me constantly every day. So of course knowing him for that period of time it was normal to develop a little crush on him. No big deal, right? He was probably aware of it at some time cause I would get teased by kids about people saying that I liked him and whatnot. Anyways, its been about 5 years later.....and over this winter we've both been at the same place every day for a couple hours. A sports type of thing....he has coaching that he's doing and I'm doing an exercise thing so we bump into each other every now and then and he still jokes with me, etc. So then not too long ago we started emailing each other at work. Our emails are pretty much just one liners and short and to the point...we joke around alot and whatever but lately it's become almost a flirtatious type of banter between the two of us. I know that he has that sense of humor and so do I and maybe its nothing...but I still wonder if this is ok. I mean with me it should be cause I'm just joking around and whatever but he's married. For example we joke around about him coming over to my place, blah blah blah and we talk about sports and playing one-on-one but really depending on how you percieve the words its not about a sport, catch my drift? All it is is emails and nothing more, but then I'll see him later on that day at the Sports Center and he'll smile and have me come over and talk to him and we'll joke around some more. So really is it ok for him, or 'us' I should say, to be doing this?? I am a non-believer in adultry and would never let it go that far, if thats where it was ever headed too...but should I be worried here? Or knowing him for as long as I have is he just having fun playing with me because he can?? Your advice would me much appreciated. Thank you!

RomanceClass.com Advice
It's a dangerous path to continue. If you are sure you can control your emotions then keep on doing what you are doing. But, if you have any doubt (and I do) that you can keep it platonic then my advice is to slowly reduce the sexual banter. You might even want to tell him straight out that you don't feel comfortable flirting because he is married.

Good luck,

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com

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