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Love and art do not embrace what is beautiful - but what is made beautiful by this embrace. --Karl Kraus

I've almost all my life avoided love

Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Female
I've almost all my life avoided love. I dont really have a full reason why, but it might be because i grow up with my mom a single parent. And I've observe my auntie being abused by her husband! At the age of 13 I had more negative thoughts about male more than anyone I have ever came across. One thing thats hard for me to do is trust anyone! It can be a male or female I cant trust at all!!! I dont know if there something of my pass that has me like this or what it maybe. I from the begining of age 16 until now never wanted to meet anyone, nor was i lookin to be with anyone n most of all i didnt want anyone lookin for me! I am now presently involve with this young man who 20 years old. and we grew to each other. My first impression of him wasnt much because i wasnt interesting in meeting anyone, so you could say we only was friends. The only reason me n him started talking was because my cousin n his cousin was n still are currently dating and we just use to tag along. we saw each other every other day n adventualy we started seeing each other everyday to the point where i became excited to see him n wanting to spend time with him! I then started writing poems about him and dreaming about him. With all that spending time feelings adventually developed. He told me he was interested in me from the beginning n i jus ignored. Time with eachother became short because he was going back to college...he only was here for summer. But in that time I got emotionally attached. The early morning aug.10 (my b-day) he asked me if i wud be his girl...i then ignored him again (wanted to say yea very badly!) We spend the whole day together because he was leaving the followin morning. We got to a point where we both was really quite and thinking. With all my thoughts n all my feelings for him rushing to me at once i started cryin! He comforted me and i told him i did want to make us official!!! He did leave the followin morning! my question is: Being who i am...n not able to trust anyone, why is it that i'm chancing the most difficult trustworthy thing ( along distance relationship) and by my story n u probably could tell i really like him...do u think its worth tryin to biuld a trust with him because i still find it hard to trust anyone although i want to so bad? N do you think i'm falling in love with him? He does call everyday. n he seems to be interested! PLEASE DO HELP ME!

RomanceClass.com Advice
You are right that a long distance romance is difficult and especially for you having the trust issue you do.

You run the risk of being hurt and that would be hard for you to endure in your first relationship. Yet the only way to move ahead in the world (or in relationships) is to take risks.

Move ahead with him with great caution but with strong courage. Enjoy the present with him as if there is no tomorrow, but also know that we never know what tomorrow might bring.

Best of luck to you!

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com

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