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Love will not always linger longest - With those who hold it in too clenched a fist. -- Alice Duer Miller

He has not made time to come and see me and I feel hurt

Visitor's Question from a 41-50 year old Female
I met this guy who is 44 about a year ago on a blind date. We had been talking on the phone a month before we finally met. We had a wonderful time and talked nightly on the phone. He lives in a different city than I so we don't see each other very often. He has 2 stepchildren and one child from his previous marriage. We care about each other, but lately I feel neglected. He has a very demanding job and responsibilities to his kids. I told him I understand as I raised my son alone. He has not made time to come and see me and I feel hurt. He asked me if I cared about him that much and I said yes and told him I think he has known it for awhile. He did say he knew it and I wondered why he would ask me then. He told me he just wanted to be sure. His ex-wife cheated on him and left him for another woman. He also told me he is scared to show and tell me what he feels for me. I have been patient, and I care about him very much. I have tried to not be pushy or too demanding, but I just want him to make time for me. I am in love with him but never told him that I love him. Do I tell him I love him and ask him that I would like to spend more time together? Thank you if you can give me any advice?

RomanceClass.com Advice
I can't see that he has opportunity to come see you more.

He has 3 kids and a tough job. I'm not sure I could date someone in my own town under those circumstances.

The time sacrifices are going to have to be yours. You didn't say how far away he lives, but you may be able to drive over for a weekend from time to time. Or fly once a month.

What are your long-term plans? Are you going to move to his city or vice-versa or haven't you talked about that yet? If you knew which, you could do it now.

Have you tried discussing compromising how often you see each other? Give that a try.

Hope the best for you!

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com

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