Carl and PDM I thank you for the posts. I am sorry about the language and will refrain from using it.
To answer PDM's questions, I'd say yes to all of them about wanting to be with her and being lonely when she's away. The problem is that I have already opened up to her somewhat but she is the only one I have ever allowed to see a little of my emotion. I hear people throwing around the love word all the time to girlfriends/boyfriends or relatives and to them I think it is just a word cause they have lived with it all their life.
I try to hug her more and kiss her more often and when I do I stare into her eyes to try to convey this message. But I can't do it in public, I still have trouble even holding her hand in public and that's what worries me. I know that if I say I love her she'd be happy but I want it to be completely sincere when I say it.
