RomanceClass.com Forums Romance Does He/She Like Me? what does it mean?need advice

Hi,
I like my daughter's therapist and I thought he liked me too, so I asked him if he was free tonight and he said Nope, that bluntley, did I misread the signs? or is it not professional for him to socialise with a patient's mom? or was he really busy?, I am so embarressed now, and actually feel sick in my stomach, I have never asked a guy out befor, actually a have never been on a date, I am from the middle east where culture rules are to marry who ever dad choses, and that what I did, big mistake, now I am seperated, by the way now I live in a western country and the guy I like is from different relegion and european country, need advice, please, thanks

Hi & welcome. My guess is that he said no because of his profession's ethical limitations --- perhaps he feels it's inappropriate to (as you said) socialize with a patient's mom.

I don't think you should blame yourself! Personally, I think "Good for you!" for asking him out. The worst that can happen is that the man says "No" but it could be for some reason that has nothing whatsoever to do with you. Or maybe he thinks you have a lot of serious things going on right now and you should take your time with dating? (Don't know - just guessing here.)

I agree with everything Pudgie's Mom said.

You should also note that it's part of his job to get along well and be friendly with his clients and their parents, so it's possible that the signs you may have mistook for him liking you were all part of the job on his part.

Hi Sala,
Thanks for your reply, but do u think part of him being friendly with patients moms is to talk about his parents and his upbringing, and noticing I look sad and miles away?

Quite possibly, yes. I'm assuming by "therapist" you mean for emotional health, and so part of his job is to notice emotions, and from my own dealings with helping people out emotionally, the best thing I have to go on are my personal experiences. I also imagine that he's had patients who have been curious about his past, who he is, since it helps them feel more connected.

Don't get me wrong, though. I'm not trying to say that he's being nice to you just because it's his job--he's probably just a nice guy who's nice to everybody--the best kind of therapist.

Hi Sala,
Yes I think he is a nice guy who is may be nice to every one, so why bluntly say NOPE, when I asked if he was fee tonight?, that did hurt?, by the way he is an Osteopath. thanks

I don't know.

You may right--he very well may like you. Depending on how he said "nope," it, too, may have been friendly, or it may have been in such a tone to shut you out, but from what you say, I'd guess the former. Either way, it is generally a nicer response than "No."

Perhaps next time you see him, you could ask again, "What about this evening?", "I really enjoy talking with you, maybe we could meet outside of business sometime." He may already be seeing somebody else.

I really don't know--maybe somebody else on the forum will have more/better advice for you.

Oh no Sala, I could never ever ask him again, that first time was so so hard and the unexpected response hurt so much that I have no idea how I am going to see him again, I am a shy conservative woman, u can only imagine how much I do like him, for me to actually have asked him out, which will never happen again.

Try not to be embarrassed because it was wonderful that you took a step to ask him out. We all commend you on having that courage. My guess... and I think it's a pretty good one... is that under his code of ethics he cannot date a client (even though you are his client's mother, you are a client). Don't give up hope and good job for asking!!

Hi, thanks to everyone who took time to reply or even just to read, I do have another question now, what will I say when I see him again? , unfortunately I do have to see him with my daughter every week, shall I act as if nothing happened and just ignore the fact that he said no to me?, shall I apologise and note that I do understand that it is unprofessional?, or just send my daughter with a friend (but I have never done that before), will that be a childish like act? I am not thinking straight now, I do need advice, by the way I can not tell any of my friends, bec. what I did is so not like me. Thanks again.