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#240877 - 01/03/08 10:18 PM Am I (who is 19 now) acting too much like a kid?
lwhuntley4 Offline
Friend

Registered: 09/02/07
Posts: 234
Loc: Georgia
Ok. Here's the prob. My girl gave me a letter about my lack of control over my emotions.I seem to overact sometimes and I seem to act as a kid in some situations. I know I've been marked(if you wanna put it that way) with EBD (Emotional Behavior Disorder)
which is greatly killing me in my realtionship. Is it the fact i have this disorder, or is it a lie that i come to beleive and allowed control me and my relationship. sure I'm sort in Special education whil during my high school years, but is there any way how not to let it control how I act? Or is it just poor choices through life that has screwed me up?


Edited by lwhuntley4 (01/03/08 10:18 PM)
_________________________
Lee Willam Huntley IV
DJ Jah Man
Love one another, and God

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#241084 - 01/04/08 05:40 PM Re: Am I (who is 19 now) acting too much like a kid? [Re: lwhuntley4]
PDM Offline

True Blue Soulmate

Registered: 12/16/04
Posts: 22697
Loc: UK
Hi Lee

First, just so that you know where I'm coming from, I have two sons ~ one a little older than you & one a little younger ~ they have both been through some very difficult times ~ and, of course, I know a lot of their friends, all around the same age.

And I've read through your earlier posts.

Now first, how, exactly, does this lack of emotional control affect you?

If you have been told that you are affected by EBD, then it's likely that you are. Some people think that there is too much 'labelling' nowadays and that young people should just pull themselves together and get on with it; others think that things are much better now that problems are diagnosed and help is available.

I should imagine that it could be difficult having a boyfriend whose emotions are slightly 'out of control'. My son has a friend with a similar problem and it can put a strain on his relationships. On the other hand, because his friends understand him, they make allowances and the friendships remain strong.

If this girl is troubled by your behaviour, then it is probably best that she tells you. You wouldn't want her to get ever more frustrated, without you even knowing, would you?

This way, if you are able to do anything, to help yourself deal better with certain situations, she has given you the opportunity to try.

Have you tried to talk calmly with her about this, when you are feeling OK?

Have you been given coping strategies, or any other help, by a counsellor for example?

You say that you are recorded as having 'special educational needs' ~ do you have a mentor who you could talk to about this?

One thing I would say ~ if a 19-year-old girl was becoming overly emotional, then many people would just say that this was normal for a lot of 19-year-old girls. So, why should they feel differently about 19-year-old boys?
You have the same educational pressures and the same teenage hormonal imbalances.

Don't let it get to you too much. smile
Take care!
_________________________
"The secret of success is constancy to purpose" - Benjamin Disraeli.

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#241926 - 01/07/08 02:10 PM Re: Am I (who is 19 now) acting too much like a kid? [Re: PDM]
lwhuntley4 Offline
Friend

Registered: 09/02/07
Posts: 234
Loc: Georgia
Questions from your post:

1.Now first, how, exactly, does this lack of emotional control affect you?

Ans. It's like when something goes wrong (dose not have to be my way, as long as it works) I usually would just cry about it, but if is something that i realy wanted either to happen or i would try so hard to prevent and if that didn't go my way, there would be yelling and crying, and whatevera five tyear old kid would do. Now I understand like in a project if something works better than watever Im doing, i go with the other idea, but i turly hate it when my parnets try to plan, or change my dating plans.

Now there some things that I can take, like some critism. Maybe a bad remark here and there, and over time is dosen't affect me anymore. I don't hold grudges against anybody, but people just like like to push my limits, espically when they are talking bag about my girlfriend. i have tried talk ing calmly about this to her, but the only way I can is through letters, notes, and e-mails. it's hard when it's hard when it's comes to me and my mouth. i'm not saying I use profane words, it's just difficult to keep my voice low. yes again with my counslers, and my case manager. I know im doing better in some areas, cause i had n IEP meeting just a week bfore christmas break. In some classes i also have mentors, but some of them are just plain crazy, or they just don't have the time which i can understand. but th crazy ones, make me happy no matter how down I am. and ith that qoute you me there at th bottom of your post "One thing I would say ~ if a 19-year-old girl was becoming overly emotional, then many people would just say that this was normal for a lot of 19-year-old girls. So, why should they feel differently about 19-year-old boys?
You have the same educational pressures and the same teenage hormonal imbalances. " I think your right.
_________________________
Lee Willam Huntley IV
DJ Jah Man
Love one another, and God

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#241932 - 01/07/08 02:27 PM Re: Am I (who is 19 now) acting too much like a kid? [Re: lwhuntley4]
emory Offline
Friend

Registered: 12/11/07
Posts: 217
i have personal experience, i had been in special education since elementry, and would consider i have ebd, but i dont let it go to my head, i always have to have it my way even if im wrong, but you have to stop and think before you speak i know its hard, but it will help you reliaze the situation before you say the wrong things, your lucky you have classes, and counslers to talk to but it all goes back to your childhood, how your parents talked and reacted when the conversated with you
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#241937 - 01/07/08 02:37 PM Re: Am I (who is 19 now) acting too much like a kid? [Re: lwhuntley4]
PDM Offline

True Blue Soulmate

Registered: 12/16/04
Posts: 22697
Loc: UK
From my knowledge of my son's friend, the best thing you can do is make some really good, understanding friends, who will support you, and help you through things, especially when you are under pressure.

If it's easier to write than talk ~ well, fair enough, just write.

Try not to worry too much ~ it won't help. smile
_________________________
"The secret of success is constancy to purpose" - Benjamin Disraeli.

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#241939 - 01/07/08 02:46 PM Re: Am I (who is 19 now) acting too much like a kid? [Re: PDM]
lwhuntley4 Offline
Friend

Registered: 09/02/07
Posts: 234
Loc: Georgia
thx yall. if you yall got anything other advice to me it would help. and for the record, yall are the friends who I can cope with.
_________________________
Lee Willam Huntley IV
DJ Jah Man
Love one another, and God

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#241940 - 01/07/08 02:50 PM Re: Am I (who is 19 now) acting too much like a kid? [Re: lwhuntley4]
emory Offline
Friend

Registered: 12/11/07
Posts: 217
your welcomed if i helped you, thats all i could say, =]]
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i loOve bRoDiE nIkKeN!

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