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#334855 - 10/29/08 05:18 PM Re: is this normal? [Re: kksuns]
ßÄУµÇK1674 Offline
Regular

Registered: 02/02/08
Posts: 98
Loc: California
trick or treaters. i really think i love her. kinky things have gotten farther in our texts now and becomeing a bit more sexual.

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#335164 - 10/30/08 08:41 PM Re: is this normal? [Re: ßÄУµÇK1674]
Carl Offline
Silver Star Soulmate

Registered: 05/27/06
Posts: 5173
Loc: Gator Country, Florida - USA
Interesting discussion, Xenoki. I like it that you and your friend are talking things out, as well as RPing and exploring your boundaries.

In your eyes, and in mine, I am an old man.

When I was a teen, I suppose I would have been frightened by situations too potentially dangerous to me. But pretty much, a teen aged heterosexual boy went as far as he could until the girl said no, stop.

I wish I could say I was more mature, but I wasn't. And my sexual history was not exactly as a predator, either, since females have always taught me. I'd like to think that I've been appreciative and sensitive to them, but I know that they were wiser - from birth, do you think?

However, what I want to say is this. I'm not trying to say that things are the same for you as they were for me back in the "olden days."

But what I think you need to be prepared for is this:

Where I depended upon the female to stop us, and felt like "going ahead" was what males were supposed to at least "try" to do; it sounds like to me that you are shaping up to be the one who will need to know when and how to stop.

And no matter that most 15-year-olds probably know much more than I knew at that age (but possibly not, as the physiology and mechanics are the same) - the point is that a male teen's hormones are going to send a completely different signal than what you may plan now.

I applaud you for being responsible in your relationship. And here's hoping you don't mind an old man's rambling.
_________________________
Marge is the love of my life.

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#335168 - 10/30/08 08:53 PM Re: is this normal? [Re: Carl]
ßÄУµÇK1674 Offline
Regular

Registered: 02/02/08
Posts: 98
Loc: California
I have always been afraid of what my hormones might make me do...i almost got violent once with my friend...i don't remember why, but after that i kinda shut myself out from starting a relationship, my girlfriend now, she means so much to me, i have never even gotten up the nerve to hold her hand she had to do it, and we have been together for almost a year except for the month we broke up. i really want to kiss her tomorrow when i am with her but i am really scared i might do something stupid. any advice?

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#335176 - 10/30/08 09:09 PM Re: is this normal? [Re: ßÄУµÇK1674]
Carl Offline
Silver Star Soulmate

Registered: 05/27/06
Posts: 5173
Loc: Gator Country, Florida - USA
On the kiss, she will let you know. If you're not sure, ask her. Nothing wrong with, "Are you wanting me to kiss you?"

Don't want to do something stupid? Deliberately keep the atmosphere different than the role playing that you do online. Be tender and brief in your kiss. Hold hands. Walk together. Hug. Talk. You understand.

The relationship will grow leaps and bounds - in your hearts.
_________________________
Marge is the love of my life.

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#335188 - 10/30/08 09:43 PM Re: is this normal? [Re: Carl]
ßÄУµÇK1674 Offline
Regular

Registered: 02/02/08
Posts: 98
Loc: California
She told me she wanted me to kiss her. The bondage is strictly in RP...for now, but i am not ready for that in real life yet. I have no clue how to do it and i am kinda scared...

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#335191 - 10/30/08 09:50 PM Re: is this normal? [Re: ßÄУµÇK1674]
Carl Offline
Silver Star Soulmate

Registered: 05/27/06
Posts: 5173
Loc: Gator Country, Florida - USA
You've not kissed a female who is not family before? Technique will come about with practice. Mainly a matter of turning the head a little so the noses don't hit each other (or glasses). Lips can be parted a little, but you don't have to try to swallow her lips. And gentle pressure for a short time, and draw back. That lets her know you are not trying to push her.

Of course, sounds like she may want to take charge of the kiss and show you how it's done. If that is the case, and you begin to feel a bit strange, or maybe too excited, you can still pull back.

And although this may sound funny, you can always ask her to show you how to kiss. Believe me, it will not make her like you less. Knowing that you like her, and want to kiss her, but are worried that you may not do it "right" will be a plus to her - not a negative.
_________________________
Marge is the love of my life.

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#335192 - 10/30/08 09:54 PM Re: is this normal? [Re: Carl]
PDM Offline

True Blue Soulmate

Registered: 12/16/04
Posts: 22697
Loc: UK
I think that it will just come naturally, when the time is right smile
_________________________
"The secret of success is constancy to purpose" - Benjamin Disraeli.

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#335371 - 10/31/08 06:48 PM Re: is this normal? [Re: PDM]
ßÄУµÇK1674 Offline
Regular

Registered: 02/02/08
Posts: 98
Loc: California
She has never kissed anyone before just as i have not. We both want to kiss but are both scared and she wants me to make the move.

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#335372 - 10/31/08 07:00 PM Re: is this normal? [Re: ßÄУµÇK1674]
Carl Offline
Silver Star Soulmate

Registered: 05/27/06
Posts: 5173
Loc: Gator Country, Florida - USA
I'm going to make a suggestion that is revolutionary. I doubt very seriously that your Mom expects that you will go throughout life never kissing someone you are interested in romantically.

Tell her you'd like to kiss this girl, and ask her advice on how you should do it.

You may be surprised at the support you get, and if you ask her privately, nobody else need know that you asked.

And I can guarantee you that it will make your Mom's day.
_________________________
Marge is the love of my life.

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#335381 - 10/31/08 07:39 PM Re: is this normal? [Re: Carl]
PDM Offline

True Blue Soulmate

Registered: 12/16/04
Posts: 22697
Loc: UK
Or you could ask your Dad.


Or just let things happen nturally.
Start with a hug and a peck on the cheek.:)


Edited by PDM (10/31/08 07:42 PM)
_________________________
"The secret of success is constancy to purpose" - Benjamin Disraeli.

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