RomanceClass.com Forums Romance Does He/She Like Me? Does She Like Me?

I'm majorly interested in this one girl, and mildly interested in one of her best friends.

I am great friends with both of them, but maybe better friends with the first.

The first girl I met halfway through freshman year. I really got to know her this sophomore year though. She's really laughy and has a lively personality (as far as I know when I'm around). We interact a lot on Facebook and texts. When we were just friends, our talks would usually be about homework and would be brief, but now we have these long drawn-out convos. At school, she sometimes holds these long stares with me that usually start out as bunch of giggles and smiles then she just looks into my eyes, and then I usually start smiling. It's been going on for three months and I think that's when I started having feelings for her. I can tell I'm pretty much in love with her because when we talk or laugh in person, everyone around me might just have melted away. I don't feel shy around her, but when I try to remember our conversations, I can only recall what she said.
The problem (for me) is there's another guy. Since we didn't go to same middle school, I don't know about their history and I don't want to go out of my way to find out. I know that they used to date and then broke up, but are still great friends. In fact, everyone can say the romance is still going. They hang out with each other ignoring the rumors. This guy took her to homecoming going as friends. The weird thing was the day after he asked her, she was crying because I think another guy who may have liked her hurt her feelings somehow. I wasn't that great friends with her yet, but I assumed it was cause the second guy wanted to take her and he got mad or something. I didn't delve into it, and I was taking someone else. This other guy (ignore the second "mad" guy) is not all the bad guy. He is pretty much the perfect gentleman whom I'm also great friends with. If they have a nice serene friendship/relationship status going on, I don't want to butt in as the douche.

So one of her best friends has a somewhat similar personality but she's different in some ways and I don't think we're as close, but we sometimes flirt, make fun of each other, and
some physical contact now and then. If I got to know her more.

Picking the one that's not complicated isn't easy. It's obvious that I have more affections with the first girl from that wall of text I wrote. I only mention a second girl because the first girl is on vacation in a foreign country and the past few days, the second girl and I are a little closer. If I was hanging out with both of them and other friends I'd devote most of my interests to the first girl.

I don't even know what my question for advice is anymore...what do I do?

Hello and welcome

So you are friendly with two girls and you find them both pleasant and attractive ~ let's call them 'Girl A' and 'Girl B'.

You are particularly attracted to Girl A. You go as far as saying that you are in love with her.

Girl A also acts as if she were attracted to you ~ gazing into your eyes, etc.

But ~ she has an ex-boyfriend, who is still on the scene as a friend ~ such a good friend that others think that they are still secretly dating (?)

Girl B has a similar personality to Girl A, and you get on well with her ~ even flirting at times. At present, you definitely prefer Girl A.

However, you just don't know how you might feel about Girl B, if you just knew her better ~ and you are now getting the chance to know her, because her Girl A is currently abroad.

So what do you do?

Do you wait for Girl A to return and ask her out?

Do you try to forget about Girl A, because of the ex?

Do you ask Girl B out, because she is nice and girl A is out of the country ~ and still possibly with her ex?

It's a long time since I was a teenager, but I do recall that it was possible to find various people attractive, all at the same time. It is probably something to do with hormones

You cannot date them all at the same time, though, so you have to sort out your feelings somehow.

Personally, I think that one should choose to date someone who is actually a nice person, rather than someone who is simply attractive.

I also think that one should date someone whom one actually likes, because that is only fair on both parties.

Of course, one can only go out with a person who is willing to go on a date.

This is general advice ~ but what about your personal situation?

You like both girls, but feel that you actually 'love' Girl A.
In this case, then, it seems a bit unfair to consider dating Girl B.

However, you feel that, if you knew Girl B better, then your feelings towards her might change and become more romantic. If this is the case, I would say that you are not really in love with Girl A.

Is it possible that your feelings towards Girl A were related to the looks that she was giving you?

I would say that you should only pursue a relationship with Girl B, if you are certain that your feelings for her have become more special, and that your feelings for Girl A have gone away. Otherwise it is not fair on any of the three of you.

If you no longer care for Girl A, and you do care for Girl B, then ask her out.

Otherwise, wait for Girl A to return and see how you feel about both of them then.

If you still have strong feelings for Girl A, when she returns, then you will need to ask her how things stand with her ex.

If they are genuinely just good friends, then you can ask her out.

If she is unavailable, then you will just have to accept that.

Maybe your feelings for Girl B will grow stronger in due course, but only ask her out if she is genuinely the girl you want to date ~ otherwise you will both feel unhappy about it.

Good luck