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#200546 - 07/19/07 01:55 PM Best Friend to Hook Up
Michaelsgirl Offline
New Member

Registered: 07/19/07
Posts: 3
Hey i'm a 15 year old girl with some questions. This weekend I'm visiting my best friend since kindergarden. He lives about 200 miles away b/c my family moved a couple years ago. We still talk occasionally and i'm very excited to see him this weekend. But I kinda wanna hook up with him. So my questions are a.) how can i tell if he wants to do the same thing b.) is it exactly a good idea to do it? and c.) how can i tell him i wanna hookup without accually telling him.

P.S. thank you for helping!

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#200616 - 07/19/07 06:20 PM Re: Best Friend to Hook Up [Re: Michaelsgirl]
PDM Offline

True Blue Soulmate

Registered: 12/16/04
Posts: 22697
Loc: UK
Hi Michaelsgirl and welcome.

We have a few people on the forum who have been 'friends', but where the relationship seems to be changing to 'something more'. Some people feel comfortable with this; others feel that it might put the original friendship in jeopardy.

Personally, I think that partners should also be best friends ~ but I can see a problem should the relationship not work out. Could such a friendship survive a failed romance??

Who knows? You are quite young, so relationships will be changing anyway.

If you know him well, then you could probably tell whether he might be interested in you in a romantic way.

I suppose you could always ask him if he would like to go somewhere with you ~ the cinema perhaps ~ as your date ~ and see what he says.

Welcome to the forum. smile
_________________________
"The secret of success is constancy to purpose" - Benjamin Disraeli.

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#200752 - 07/20/07 10:53 AM Re: Best Friend to Hook Up [Re: PDM]
Princess K Offline
Great Friend

Registered: 07/16/07
Posts: 494
Loc: USA
I'm pretty close (3 years older) in age with you and I really get where you're coming from. There have been friends that I've wanted to (and have) hooked up with. Let me be the first to warn you. You're "friendship" will never be the same.

1. you could end up dating and that's totally different than just being friends (one of the best feelings too and less awkward than most other dating relationships... you've been first dating for years)

2. you could become "friends with benefits" where when you hang out, that's all you're going to do it hook up, perhaps watch a movie. But there won't be anymore just pal-ing around. And you may feel extremely used, like he only calls when he wants a cheap booty call.

3. He'll be completely mortified and that's the end of the friendship.

4. (this doesn't happen very often) He won't want to and you'll end up brushing off the whole incident and acting like it never happened, and voila your friendship is all well and good.

So, my only advice is do what you feel like (your instincts) but be prepared to accept the consequences, whether good or bad.

In terms of telling if he wants to hook up as well, you really have to know how to read him. If he's acting differently than he has in the past. If you high five and he holds your hand that extra second, or a hug lasts a little longer than usual, or he won't let you catch him in his PJs, just silly things like that send of a signal of maybe wanting more than just a friendship. If you guys are really close, just sit down and talk about it. Don't make a big deal about it though, or you'll freak him out, even if he does like you.
_________________________
Love doesn't make the world go 'round; love is what makes the ride worthwhile.

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