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A Love Quote
All love that has not friendship for its base, Is like a mansion built upon the sand. --Ella Wheeler Wilcox

I like this girl, but was just recently started dating this other guy.

Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Male
Hello! Well, to start off, there is this girl in my speech class and we're on the speech team together. (Nerdy I know :P). We talk sometimes, and we also just got finished with a tournament. She flirted with me a lot, smiling, laughing, and talking with me. Even did stuff like use me as a footrest (sounds weird xD). She had sort of liked this other guy, and he asked her out and she said yes. Thing is, she's shown a lot of interest in me, but he kind of beat me to it. This douche isn't really a nice guy, and I've noticed it. He touches her and makes advances, and she doesn't really like it. I'm not going to go into a debate on who is more suitable. he asked her out first. I'd just like to know how I can ease myself in, perhaps suggest she break up or something. Most importantly, I don't want to be some support friend character that helps her through this.

Sorry if it was long, + thx! :)

RomanceClass.com Advice
There is nothing shameful about being a supportive friend. Ultimately, if this guy is not right for her, it will work out on its own. And maybe she would love for you ask her out, once she is free. It sounds like her new relationship won't last, in any case.

This guy did get there first, and she did say yes. So you are kind of now the friend by default. Continue to be the kind of friend she needs. Try not to push her to break up with this guy, since any kind of fallout is best when it happens naturally.

You can certainly let her know that you care about her as more than a friend, though. An honest conversation could be really good, letting her know she does have options. Good luck!

-- from Jill
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com

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