Tales of the Ex @ RomanceClass -
And every time I see her, hear her name, hear her voice...It's like a knife in my chest.

It all started 4 years ago. I met this girl through a friend of mine. She was a beautiful girl, but I wasn't really looking for a relationship at the time. She, however, was, and went out with another one of my friends. That relationship went on for about a year, until they finally broke up. They were never very "together" anyway. They were almost afraid to sit next to each other wherever they were. She got very desperate and started dating guy after guy and dumped each and every one of them over a term of 2 years until she was to the point of killing herself. She had always trusted me as a friend and, after all her friends had turned their backs on her, I was the only one left to pick up the pieces. I helped her out of her depression and, despite the fact that I still wasn't interested, started to feel attracted to her. I never told her, and I did a good job of not showing it either. I didn't want to get in a relationship with her because she was still hurting from past experiences. One day around last December, she started mentioning "revenge" on some of our friends. One of her friends (one of mine too) had done some stuff that wasn't exactly what you'd call moral with the guy she was dating. I was also friends with this guy. You could say it was a cirlce of friends we had here. Anyway, my ex was talking about getting "revenge" on these two friends of ours. She said we could get revenge by pretending WE were going out. I'm thinking to myself, "That doesn't sound like revenge, that sounds like an excuse for going out with me." But I dismissed that as well. So, this January, on the way to a church retreat up in Big Bear, CA, she made the first move. We were sitting next to each other on the bus, and it was a cold night, as it is in the mountains in winter, and she snuggled up next to me. I didn't refuse, even though I wanted to. I went with it. Our relationship grew over that retreat, and when we came back, it was final. We were together. She was the girl of my dreams, beautiful, smart, gentle, kind...a preverbial angel. I wanted to tell her I loved her...but I didn't know if I could. I finally told her, and she said it back. My heart was soaring. We went out on a date and saw a movie and grabbed some coffee, with her in my arms the entire time. I felt great. But, one day, she ignored my phone call. I talked to her at church and she was strangly cold towards me. Then I got an email message saying "It's been fun, but I only like you as a friend." She had led me on, she made the move, she kissed me first, she's the one who wanted to have a relationship. Then she didn't have the guts to dump me in person? In all it lasted about 2 1/2 months...early January through mid-March. It's almost September and my heart is still in pieces...I thought she was the one...now I don't think I could ever date again. And you know how people never see their ex's again? Well, I see her EVERY WEEK. And every time I see her, hear her name, hear her voice...It's like a knife in my chest.






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