Tales of the Ex @ RomanceClass -|
love blinds all
First thing’s first. This is a smart guy, with two girl siblings. Some people thought he was arrogant.. but I never really noticed that part of him. I guess that’s what they mean by ‘love blinds all.’ Anyways, he was a smart guy. So I never told him that I liked him before (one of my friends asked without my permission, and he said NO).. but if he never noticed.. that would be weird. On with my ‘story’.. I just want to say that he was the first guy that I didn't like out of a shallow nature. I grew closer to him.. after he was deeply hurt with a breakup with one of my friends, which was unexpected. I guess a felt sympathy for him. We connected pretty well, more so online than in school and when we saw each other in class, he almost always wore a smile on his face when he saw me. I was pretty shy in person, but he was more outgoing than I was.. and we talked sometimes, in person. It only took a few months for me to fall for him.. and when I did, I fell hard. I even gave him a present for X'mas! Only, I made a mistake by asking him to be my school brother over instant messaging, because I was scared that he was getting distant from me. Surprisingly, he was nice about it and agreed to my proposal. We e-mailed each other a lot and he would be pretty friendly with me. Often, other girls thought he actually developed a crush on me, because he was evidently REALLY REALLY nice to me.. I don't know what I was thinking.. but that made me like him even more. He was smart.. talented.. nice.. But later, I became clingy. I e-mailed him nonstop. And he was a busy guy. One morning I received a message that said something along the lines of 'i don't have time to make small talk.' after a couple of weeks, we were a little normaler in conversation again.. but i never felt the same again. when I received that e-mail, it hurt me to the very core. I was silent for the whole morning and there was a weird expression on my face.. I was dazed. It was rejection. Afterwards, every time I saw him, my face would scrunch up, my gaze would harden and I would be unsure every time I saw him. I knew I still liked him but I was so scared that if I said hi... he would hate me. Because I don't know but I think he dislikes me now. I gave him an X'mas present the second year, after this year of insecurity and not being in his classes... I found out we pretty much grew apart. He gave me a present in return, the day after, but I could tell that he was not really happy when he wished me "merry christmas" quickly. It really stung that he hadn't made an effort to keep in touch with me. I was always the one to start conversations, so I stopped that habit in futile hopes that he would initiate a convo. We have sort of.. different friends now. And it's been two/three years since I've known him. Does he think of me, I wonder? And what does he think of me now? That's what goes through my head when I see him in the one class we share together this year.. Cuz everytime I see a rubix cube (which is unavoidable since every asian guy plays with it now).. I think of him. I think of the past, that first Christmas when I shyly placed that present in his hands. I think of his smile when I found out that he brought it to school multiple times, working on it with a smile. And it claws at me.
2.33 out of 5 slimes
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