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A Love Quote
For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul. -- Judy Garland



Tales of the Ex @ RomanceClass -
Confused

My life felt as if it was improving my love for my significant other was growing by each waking moment and I would sacrifice soo much to be with her. I sacrificed nights out with mates which is common I know but I sacrificed it to the extent that it would be rare of me to see them. I even lost alot of my time away from my family and missed a private view to one of my tutors exhibitions which is a rare occasion.

I was there for her in her darkest hours, being with her when she was in hospital 24/7 a whole week, rushing from work also during this time. Everything I did was for her and very little was for myself. She did have some hang-ups as we all do, but after all I went through I still loved her. Suddenly I was pondering whither I was receiving equal amount of affection back. Almost overnight it seemed she had become a different person.

Suddenly I heard very little contact back and eventually she wanted to talk to me one to one, I genuinely wasn't sure what was going to happen because I still loved her and thought that she still loved me. She dumped me I was a little shocked but could see that there was times where she would barely talk to me about anything.

I asked why and she gave petty excuses....maybe to make it easier, but then she would say things which I dont know whither it was intentional or not but it hurt me badly, it seemed she only saw the small amount of darkness in everything instead of the great times we had and what I had done for her, which outweighed what petty excuses she gave.

She said she could do without this (she was a diabetic going through a rough patch in her life) it just made me feel that I was some kind of burden ontop of her pain with her condition. It made me feel small and hurt, thats the last thing you want someone you loved to say to you. also stating I was there but not there, I tried my hardest to make her happy and she says something like that it was heart crushing.

Not to mention she wouldn't open up to me, and yet shes making out that I wasnt there for her. The hardest part of this is knowing that someone loved you and you thought they would carry on loving you for who you are, but now standing at a crossroads pondering moments of thinking did she ever actually love me. I stand confused and heart broken and the biggest problem is I want to hate her for everything she has done to me, the disregards for my own needs for affection and how she treated me in the final moments of our relationship, but I just cant... a part of me still loves her, with time that spark will fade, but the scarring of the emotional confusion of understanding someone and being able to reveal your vulnerable side and intimacy might never return to the way it was.






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