he used to lie/cheat - now arguments

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Visitor's Question:
ive been with my boyfriend for over a year, but only in the last 3 has it started to sort itself out. ive never cheated or lied to him and he knows that and trusts me, but hes done it to me on many
occasions, probably many i dont know about too, as well as saying really harsh things
when i confronted him and told him i was leaving, it really scared him. he now says
he loves me and he wont do it again. things really are good when we dont argue. however, when we have little arguments over small issues
it totally blows up. sometimes i reckon he uses a small thing ive done wrong to try and make me
feel as bad as possible despite it being a tiny ridiculous issue. i really dont know what to do
because i love him and want things to be really good always. but i also want us to be able to disagree on things without him losing his temper. i dont think i want to break up, or
go on a break because itd just upset me thinking he could see other people etc.. (i dont know if he
would, but the idea of it). dont really know what question i have here, im just confused and frustrated.



Our Suggestion:
The main problem seems to be his inability to control his anger.

There are good programs out there and good professional counselors who could help him with anger management problems. Ask around to see what's available or look it up in the yellow pages under psychotherapists.

Good luck! George





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