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True Blue Soulmate
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True Blue Soulmate
Joined: Jan 2007
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I'm not trying to sound like Mr. Popular, so don't take it the wrong way. 
So this one girrl in my class, Katherine, and I have liked eachother since 6th grade (I'm in 8th right now) but we have only officially gone out on 2 dates. We are not "going out" (you know, middle school stuff) but we both know we like eachother and we have told eachother. The realllly annoying thing is that people in our class, mainly her best friends, are pressuring me and her to "go out" with eachother...even though I personally think it will have NO effect on our relationship. "Going out" is really just a phrase that means nothing to me...we will still like eachother just as much...
Anyway, there is this other girrl, Kelsey, and has been flirting with me this entire year. But a few days ago in science class, she was REALLY flirting with me. After class, Katherine got super mad at her. The weird thing is, that Kelsey and her friends are my good friends, and Katherine is my GF. So whenever I talk to Kelsey and her friends, they are complaining that Katherine is over reacting. Whenever I talk to Katherine, her and her friends are talking about how annoying and rude Kelsey is. ( Yes, I've got plenty of friends that are guys, too. ) Then when I talk to them, they pressure me into gossiping about the other "group". I do have to say, that I agree with BOTH of them... 
I am very confused, and don't know what to do.
This also seems to be hurting my relationship with Katherine because we don't talk and stuff nearly as much.
Please help!
What should I do?!
Thanks,
3bud
Last edited by 3budgies; 05/15/07 08:59 PM.
Emmit
RIP Jayka and Grayson
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True Blue Soulmate
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True Blue Soulmate
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Ok.
Katherine's friends say that you should go out with her. Chances are, if they are her true friends, that they are reflecting her thoughts.
Kelsey is your friend & she has been flirting with you.
What should Katherine do?
After all, you say that she is your g/f, but you are not going out with her ~ that makes you 'a free man'.
Kelsey thinks, therefore, that she has a chance with you ~ and Katherine probably thinks that Kelsey does, too.
You shouldn't be gossiping about your girlfriend to anyone ~ and gossiping is not nice anyway.
Kelsey thinks that you can't be that keen on Katherine, because you don't want to go out with Katherine, and you are friends with her, and you gossip about Katherine with her.
Katherine must think that you can't be that keen on Katherine, because you don't want to go out with Katherine, and you are friends with Kelsey, who flirts with you in front of Katherine, and you even gossip about Katherine with her.
Maybe you are too young to be 'going out' anyway, but, the way I see it, your behaviour may be making poor Katherine look a bit of a fool. Is that what you want? No wonder she's upset.
It may be possible to be friends with both girls but, if Katherine is your girlfriend, you must not respond to flirting from someone else. And you must not gossip about her with that someone else. It's rude and unfair.
"The secret of success is constancy to purpose" - Benjamin Disraeli.
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Joined: Jan 2007
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True Blue Soulmate
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OP
True Blue Soulmate
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I'm sorry if I was confusing, but I have never gossiped about Katherine. I know I said they pressure me into gossiping about the other group, but what I really meant was that I listen to them gossiping. I almost never participate. I chose the wrong words, PDM. I am very sorry for the confusion. Katherine's friends say that you should go out with her. Chances are, if they are her true friends, that they are reflecting her thoughts. Yes, definitly. I have actually overheard her saying "I wish he would just ask me out already and get it over with." So they are reflecting her thoughts - you are right. Kelsey thinks, therefore, that she has a chance with you ~ and Katherine probably thinks that Kelsey does, too.
Kelsey thinks that you can't be that keen on Katherine, because you don't want to go out with Katherine, and you are friends with her, and you gossip about Katherine with her. Hmm, I never thought of that. Thanks for pointing that out. Except I don't ever gossip about Katherine - and very rarely do I gossip about anyone else. Maybe you are too young to be 'going out' anyway, but, the way I see it, your behaviour may be making poor Katherine look a bit of a fool. Is that what you want? No wonder she's upset. I know what you mean...people make such a big deal about "going out" in middle school...Erm, what beavior is making her look like a fool? Me not asking her out? Oh,do you mean that it makes her seem like she is "desperate"? No, I definitly do not want that. It may be possible to be friends with both s but, if Katherine is your friend, you must not respond to flirting from someone else. And you must not gossip about her with that someone else. It's rude and unfair. Definitly. I was only friends with Katherine in 6th grade, but then when I figured ot that she liked me, I started to like her too... Definitly. The thing is that I am oblivious when Kelsey is flirting with me - since she is my friend, I don't usually find it "flirting" until someone points it out to me... Thanks for the help PDM.
Last edited by 3budgies; 05/15/07 11:40 PM. Reason: spelling
Emmit
RIP Jayka and Grayson
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Joined: May 2007
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Regular
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Regular
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Date the hotter girl.
You'll have all the same problems with an ugly girl as a hot one.
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Joined: Jan 2007
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True Blue Soulmate
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OP
True Blue Soulmate
Joined: Jan 2007
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Emmit
RIP Jayka and Grayson
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True Blue Soulmate
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True Blue Soulmate
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Parrish, that's not respectful.
"The secret of success is constancy to purpose" - Benjamin Disraeli.
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Joined: May 2007
Posts: 83
Regular
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Regular
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Joined: Dec 2004
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True Blue Soulmate
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True Blue Soulmate
Joined: Dec 2004
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I'm pleased to hear that you don't gossip.
I'll tell you how I would feel if I were Katherine ~ just based on what you have stated.
He seems to like me, but he seems to like her, too.
If he really liked me, he'd ask me out ~ am I really his girlfriend or not?
Does he like Kelsey better, perhaps?
She is trying to make him interested.
She must be laughing at me, while she is criticising me to him and I'm over here looking confused and miserable.
Of course, I don't know Kelsey or Katherine. I don't know what sorts of personalities they have. I don't know how they feel about each other.
Girls have a tendency to try to out-do each other when it comes to boys.
When I was younger, one girl used to sit by my boyfriend, leaving me to either sit elsewhere, looking like a gooseberry, or make a fuss and look desperate.
Another used to go on about how much she fancied him.
How do you think I felt?
Yes, it was nice to know that I was the one he had chosen, but I still felt awkward and a bit foolish. It's a bit embarrassing to have to pretend that it doesn't bother you, whilst another girl is trying to take your boyfriend's attention away from you.
But you may well be too young to be 'going out' anyway.
"The secret of success is constancy to purpose" - Benjamin Disraeli.
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Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 10,115
True Blue Soulmate
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OP
True Blue Soulmate
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It seems very likely that what you said you would be thinking, is what she is really thinking... What I need to do is tell Kelsey that I am only her friend, and that Katherine is my real g/f. About how they feel about eachother...I know that they are not friends nor enemies. Yeah, you're story can be related to alot of people inmy class... As for "going out", I totaly understand your point, and I totaly agree. But do you think going to the movies is okay? Is it even okay for 8th graders to have bf/gf? Thanks so much for the help PDM. 
Last edited by 3budgies; 05/16/07 12:36 AM.
Emmit
RIP Jayka and Grayson
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New Member
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well yes i agree with you..tell kelsey how you honestly feel about her...dont lead her on anything but taking who to the movies kelsey or your girlfriend.? if its kelsey no dont do that! thats why you have your girlfriend she probably makes a move and you will cheat
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