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Dagny Offline OP
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My mom thinks he should leave me alone. I told her I was going to ask him to stop talking to me and if he doesn't say it loud enough for everyone to hear.
She doesn't want me to be friends with him either. She doesn't see why he deserves me as his friend. Also she says if he bothers me to tell the campus police, and she told me which one to tell. She is friends with one of them, and she says that he is no nonsense. (he is tough on students who do not follow rules)
She has even told my dad about how the guy still talks to me, and my dad says that he should leave me alone.

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True Blue Soulmate
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Dagny, you sound, from the vocabulary you use, as if you may be a little afraid of this person.

He may or may not be a stalker; he may or may not just want to remain friends, but, if you feel that he is to be feared, then you should be wary and follow your gut instinct. Perhaps you shouldn't be contacting him at all ~ not even to warn him about campus security ~ just in case.


"The secret of success is constancy to purpose" - Benjamin Disraeli.
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Dagny Offline OP
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I don't contact him, he comes over and talks to me...plus we are in the cafeteria (a public place) when he talks to me...so I don't think he would get away with anything physical there.
I just would hate if he just wanted to be friends (in a harmless way) to be written up or something and then get in a bunch of trouble...
Maybe I am just a little afraid because the night we broke up he tried to keep my from leaving his house (physically) but it did not work.
I don't think he will hurt me on campus...there are little poles with buttons on if you need help, such as an emergency, robbery anything, someone will assist you

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Since you who have been close to him cannot tell whether he is harmless or not, then it is not possible for us to know.

What about others who know him?
How do people respond to him?
What do your friends, relatives and fellow-students think of him?

I agree that it would be very bad if he got a reputation as an aggressive stalker, when all he wants is to remain friends.

Equally, it would be bad if he harmed you, and you hadn't been prepared to protect yourself.

But do you have any real reason to believe that he could be violent or aggressive?


"The secret of success is constancy to purpose" - Benjamin Disraeli.
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Dagny Offline OP
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He never met any of my family/friends at home, just my mom and one friend we had mutually. She though he was a great person, and said he would be a good boyfriend for me. I know she really liked him as a person, and I took that as a sign when I started dated him that he was a good person.
I am not really friends with any of his other friends, but yes he has friends. They tend to be...drinkers and well I don't drink so we never got together and I never met them.
I met one of his friends one time, they hadn't seen each other since high school.
I don't have any real reason to believe he might be violent/aggressive other than those on here who say he does have red flags for an abusive person. The night I left/broke up with him he was very angry though and said something about wanting to hit a wall, but I got out of there and didn't hang around to see if he did of course...

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Peoople can, of course, get very emotional ~ upset & angry, etc ~ when they break up.


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Dagny Offline OP
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I know, thats why I really don't want to get him into trouble for nothing...overall he is a nice guy I think...hopefully he will move on and leave me alone though

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Dagny Offline OP
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Update: ok so I didn't go through with what I planned, but my friend told him to leave me alone. Today he did not talk to me or anything, but when he sees me he waves (I ignore him)
I actually decided to hide in the corner and eat lunch. I figured he would not find me there, but his friend (he said she was his girlfriend but I don't believe it) actually sat down at the table across from me! Like the cafeteria was pretty much empty, and usually she sits out in the main room, I was hiding in the corner of the other side of the cafeteria...
well he went and sat with her, at a chair where he could watch me. I don't know, I might be being paranoid but it seems as if she "found" me and sat there deliberately so it looked like he had a reason to sit there too. (is that paranoid?)
I think Wednesday if this happens I might move to another table (which I have already done when I was sitting in the main room and she sat at a table and then he sat with her and watched me...

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Strange behaviour.


"The secret of success is constancy to purpose" - Benjamin Disraeli.
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Dagny Offline OP
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yea, I've told alot of people and they agree that is strange. Out of all the tables in the room and she sits near me, his ex girlfriend? And he had to sit in the chair that faced me...part of me thinks I am just being paranoid, overreacting, but the other part thinks that this is deliberate or something.

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