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#173093 - 04/22/07 11:01 PM I will be single forever and have to buy many cats
Coco's Mama Offline
Platinum Star Soulmate

Registered: 11/18/06
Posts: 7842
Loc: Ontario, Canada
I thought maybe the men on the forum could help me (women too).

I have been single for too long, and I feel that now it is permanent. My father the soft-spoken ahem..European manhe is already told me I have no husband it is too late and I should not have children so what the role for women like me is to take care of him and my mom in their old age as I have missed a one time boat.
That was a loose translation but hopefully you get the point.

I will be completely honest I am 5ft nothing, 109lbs am 30 ouch 33 years ergo No supermodel, and annoying to me but fascinating to others evidently the average guess of my age is 22 on sight sometime low as 18 and up to 27..so it would appear i don't look my age. Wow thats alot of private info, but I feel like giving a little info may help. I have a career 9-5. ! budgie , no cats ..yet. I finished University and college and took some classes like Spanish and Excel just for fun. I am RC (roman catholic) I try. I am honest, loyal, I would never cheat. I eat like a bird and never have more than to beers so it's not like I am superhigh maintance.

So why won't a man give me the time of day. Okay so that may be imppossible to answer even my married friends are like "why r u single still?" so i ask them and one couple said they actually discussed me one day and came up with nada.

Any thoughts on my pathetic plight.

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#173110 - 04/22/07 11:40 PM Re: I will be single forever and have to buy many cats [Re: Coco's Mama]
peace.it Offline
New Member

Registered: 04/22/07
Posts: 2
too old?
Sorry to break it to you but 33 is not old.
I say just to not mope around about being single.
Get out, enjoy life have fun and if something happends then hey!
but don't harp on it.
It'll only make you feel worse.

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#173158 - 04/23/07 07:43 AM Re: I will be single forever and have to buy many cats [Re: peace.it]
Coco's Mama Offline
Platinum Star Soulmate

Registered: 11/18/06
Posts: 7842
Loc: Ontario, Canada
Thanks for saying 33 is not old.

LOL, I don't mope, or harp usu. but the forum is here to ask questions or talk about stuff so I thought I would toss it out there to see if anyone had any ideas on the subject.

I do enjoy life. We just have a short time here so we should make the most of it.
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#173205 - 04/23/07 01:00 PM Re: I will be single forever and have to buy many cats [Re: Coco's Mama]
WhitePegasus Offline
Best Friend

Registered: 06/13/06
Posts: 1300
Loc: NH
maybe give some of the online matchmakers a try! Two of my coworkers just married someone they met at E Harmony.com. i know with all the weirdos out there it can be intimidating to try something like that. The way i see it if you meet in a very busy public place in the middle of the day and don't go anywhere private with them the first few meetings, you should be just fine. I got lucky, i'm still with my high school sweet heart and i can't imagine ever being without him. Some one is out there for everyone, and 33 is most def. not too old to find them. My Uncle didn't marry until 35.
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#173266 - 04/23/07 04:14 PM Re: I will be single forever and have to buy many cats [Re: WhitePegasus]
victor Offline
Best Friend

Registered: 01/19/06
Posts: 1347
Definitely not too old!
And what's better is that you will probably "know" more quickly when you find the right guy. Although there are occasional stories of people marrying their high school sweetheart - it is much more common I think to struggle in your twenties with whomever you are dating - because both individuals are still in the process of figuring out who they are and where they want to go. By the time you are 30, alot of issues such as where you work and where you want to live, and what religion works for you - all have been settled - so you don't have to worry about growing apart which frequently occurs in the twenty-somehtings.
So in some ways, you have already cut through alot of the BS and can find somebody compatible from the get go.

Do you have any hobbies - skiing or hiking or do you like to read - if so join a ski club or book club, etc - All great ways to meet people while doing what you like. Incidentally sometimes you meet people - and they introduce you to others - and you get involved in whole new social circles. Sometimes just expanding your "crowd" can help alot and open new doors.

And even though I am not religious, since you mentioned it - are you active at your church? There must be many functions where you could meet others who already share your religion.

I think the hardest thing to do is to make a change in your routine - get out of whatever rut is preventing you from meeting new people. Do something different, take an art class, etc, etc. Be open minded yourself - do not rule out any guy just by his looks but give him a chance, just as you would want for yourself. If you want to find somebody then I think you will - but it may take a little initiative. Be adventurous - but stay true to your own instincts and don't settle for somebody you are not truly happy with - but just broaden your horizons a bit.

Incidentally - having a child - a whole other ball of wax. (and possibly a whole different thread here on the forum) ... but don't feel compelled to get a partner for the sole purpose of having a child. Luckily in this day and age if you really want a child, then you can do so on your own, and I have met many single moms who do just great (but it is alot of work!). If you find somebody who wants children too, that is great - but try to keep the two issues separate, if possible.

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#173379 - 04/23/07 07:49 PM Re: I will be single forever and have to buy many cats [Re: victor]
PDM Offline

True Blue Soulmate

Registered: 12/16/04
Posts: 22697
Loc: UK
33 is not old.
It's young.

You may seem to be too 'sorted' in your life. Men might find that a bit frightening.

I agree with Victor. Get involved with clubs etc and just meet people. It's not too late. I know from the experience of friends. Many didn't meet their partners 'til they were in their 30s.
_________________________
"The secret of success is constancy to purpose" - Benjamin Disraeli.

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#173427 - 04/23/07 09:06 PM Re: I will be single forever and have to buy many cats [Re: PDM]
Coco's Mama Offline
Platinum Star Soulmate

Registered: 11/18/06
Posts: 7842
Loc: Ontario, Canada
Wow, so many things to think about, PDM what do you mean by too sorted?

I incidently never judge by looks. I have dated a suit guy, a guy with a Mohawk and tattoos, an overweight guy , as long as they are nice you don't even "see" how they look anyway. Like a very attrative person could open there mouth an become very ugly after a few words. If you know what I mean.

I do find I get asked out alot by younger men sometimes even 20 or so...it is very frustrating. I suppose at least now I know what matters to me. But maybe I am too set in my ways now? Ahhhhhh.

Dating is awful.

Everyone hug your spouse tonight and be very thankful to be outta the wild weirdo single world.
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#173791 - 04/24/07 09:13 PM Re: I will be single forever and have to buy many cats [Re: Coco's Mama]
Tweets Offline
Long Time Friend

Registered: 03/05/07
Posts: 938
Loc: Utah
33 is NOT old at all!!!

May I ask why you find being asked out by younger men frustrating? Maybe this feeling of being frustrated by these "younger men", is holding you back? After all there are some people out there who are quite mature for their age! smile

It seriously surprises me to hear you have not been snapped up by someone! You are soo funny and interesting! I love reading your posts! You are funny and have a SUPER cute personality!!! smile I don't know what you look like but I am sure you are cute too! smile There is someone somewhere for everyone! I really belive that! So don't give up (you are still super young!) and maybe give some of those "young guys" that ask you out a chance!! smile
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Tulip adopted 3/05/2007
Tweets RIP

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#173800 - 04/24/07 10:28 PM Re: I will be single forever and have to buy many cats [Re: Tweets]
villageidiot33 Offline
Regular

Registered: 03/30/07
Posts: 67
Loc: North Dakota
I am 33 yrs old and married to what a mule and a donkey make! (lol) We have been married for almost 12 yrs and have 3 kids. I want to get a divorce but cant afford it. when I hear of people struggleing and dating. I think they are lucky for not having my husband. Things could be worse... Its easier to be single then you dont have to answer to anyone. I wouldnt change having my kids for anything! But I would change being married....
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1 hamster; Tommy
dog;shannon
2 keets;storm(m)-sunny((f)
2teils;Bo & Daisy

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#173885 - 04/25/07 05:38 AM Re: I will be single forever and have to buy many cats [Re: villageidiot33]
PDM Offline

True Blue Soulmate

Registered: 12/16/04
Posts: 22697
Loc: UK
Hi villageidiot33

I'm sorry to hear that things aren't too good in your marriage. Glad that you are enjoying your children, though.
Have you thought about relationship counselling?
It might be worth a go.
_________________________
"The secret of success is constancy to purpose" - Benjamin Disraeli.

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