Hi and welcome Sikedelikk
.
I don't know what these pictures were that you speak of, but sending them to a boy that you don't even like very much doesn't sound like a good idea. But what's done is done. The important thing now is what you do about this relationship.
Some of the things you have said would give me cause for concern.
Could you tell us how old you and this boyfriend are, please?
"... he broke up with me 'cause I told him I'd try and do intimate things with him, but I got scared and chickened out at the last minute and ended up not doing it".
If a boy breaks up with a girl because she is not ready for a sexual relationship, then he simply cannot care for her very much, in my opinion. He may well feel that he has physical needs, but these should not mean that he tries to force the girl he supposedly cares for to do things against her will.
"he then gets abusive. Verbally and only twice physically"
Abuse is not good.
Verbal abuse is really bad and shouldn't be tolerated.
Physical abuse should certainly never be tolerated.
If the relationship is abusive already, then it could get a lot worse.
His respect for women has risen since we first met, but it by no means is the greatest.
So, even though his respect for women is increasing, he is still abusive and controlling?
I'm greatly in love with him, and everything about him, including his flaws, but the lying, yelling, abusive nature in him is something I can't stand.
You love hom.
He lies and yells and is abusive.
This is a pattern that I think many women would find familiar ~ usually those who live in fear of violence for themselves and their children.
I have adopted some of his qualities and became more like him. I'm more jealous, more snappy when it comes to arguments, and I've had a more sense of wanting freedom ...
You do not like his angry and abusive personality, yet you find yourself adopting his ways. Can this be good?
You feel that you want more freedom, but he is trying to control who you speak to. Can this work?
"he wants me to CHOOSE to not talk to other guys."
But that's not a choice is it?
That is a demand.
"is it possible that I could help him with his anger? Could I also turn back in to the bubbly person I used to be instead of being his 'rule follower'..?"
He has anger problems.
You used to be bubbly.
You now follow his rules.
You are no longer the real bubbly you.
How, do you think, you could take charge of his anger situation, when you are losing your own personality to his abusive one?
I'm greatly in love with him ...
I feel for you, but you must be very careful.
Many women have committed themselves to men they really loved, who they thought they could change, but they (and their children) ended up in a violent and controlling situation, from which they found it very difficult to escape.
If this young man is to control his anger, then the best thing would be for him to go to anger management classes and counselling. Experts may be able to help him.
Maybe then things could be more positive for the two of you, but not as it now stands ~ not in my opinion.
Take care.