How to get over my exWe often have visitors write in with solutions to each others' problems. Here is a visitor's solution to one of our visitor's questions. Original Visitor's Question from a 31-40 year old Male My ex and i started dating in high school, things were okay, never great. I was a very jealous boyfriend and we occassionally fought. It was a pretty normal relationship and only got better each year. We both went far away from each other and home for college but continued to date, trying the long distance thing. Our problems began toward the end of our first year at college. I cheated on her... but i knew immediately after that it was the biggest mistake of my life. I was just insecure in a new place with new surrounding and this other girl was extremely aggressive. I swore to my gf that i would do everything i could to make it up to her and prove that she could trust me again. And i did. But later that year it seemed like my gf had drifted and was partying a lot more and i was suspicious of there being another guy. This blew over and we had the summer again together. It was like a renewal of our relationship. Things seemed even better than ever. Next year at college she continued partying a lot and we had problems because she would end up passed out in bed with some other guy, who she told me she just kissed. We would fight and figure out if she wanted to be with me or not and if so it couldnt happen again. She would promise it wouldnt happen again then do it again many times till we broke up because she 'was confused' and didnt know what she wanted. The college life got to her and i understand it. We then went on to see each other whenever we were home and it really sucked for me but i still loved her. Last summer was the last time we kinda saw each other but not much happened. Its gotten less and less. This past year she has gotten another bf and i know its over for us. Its now the summer again and i find myself thinking about her a lot. She is stuck in my thoughts and i even dream about her. Im not working at home and i thought that would help but i cant get over her. She was my first love and this small part of me feels like i will get back with her, that its not over yet, or that shes the one im meant to be with. The strange part is that i know its over, i know it wasnt the best of relationships, but i just cant let go. What should i do? User Submitted Advice from a 21-30 year old Male Join a gym I have been through that kind of situation...on and off relationship...Even if I still keep contact with her now...and feel some kind of affection towards her...I stills aid to myself that this kind of relationship we had would lead us nowhere...and once you make up your mind about it you will realize that the ocean is full of fishes, and despite the fact that this girl was your first true love, you can find somone more loving and more carying. Don't consider all this relationship as a waste of time, consider it as a good teaching that will allow you to move on and live better realtionships. To get her off your chest I would reccomend joining a gym. I did it after we broke up with my ex and it helped me alot. Not only does it help you burn all the negative energy but it also builts you up and makes you feel more confident about yourself. :) Hope you do good. The Original Question and RomanceClass Answer
|