My ex just broke up with me and he told me that if i call him again he would change his numberWe often have visitors write in with solutions to each others' problems. Here is a visitor's solution to one of our visitor's questions. Original Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female My ex just broke up with me and he told me that if i call him again he would change his number. But I don't want to lose him.I miss him so bad. We were together for two months.He broke up with me because he said I call him too much and that I'm starting to stress him out. So I kept calling him after he told me t stop calling and basically begged him to still be my friend.He said we could still be friends that I just had to stop calling him!!Help me!!I want him back User Submitted Advice from a 21-30 year old Female Pride My 'ex' broke up with me after 3 years together, by suddenly ignorning my calls.I never liked to call him too often because I like to give people their space, but we were used to speaking every day at least once, and had, what I thought was, a strong relationship. So I know the hurt and rejection you feel, even though your relationship was shorter than mine, because feelings are involved and it puts your mind in a terrible place. I've felt so hurt and rejected and only once tried to see him to hear from him what happened to make him change so suddenly. Since then, I've written him a letter, a card, and sent messages of support in sms messages so he doesn't feel pressure to talk to me, but it hurts. In six months of separation, I've only contacted him 8 times, and he still doesn't answer. I've decided that I've done my best to show him I will always be there if he needs me, even though his sudden change of behaviour i unacceptable, and that's all I can do. I don't try to call him any more because it's obvious he doesn't want me if he's not trying to reach me. It hurts but I have to face it. It's not easy for me, I have very dark days sometimes when I feel everything is hopeless, but I'm still alive and hopefully time will heal me. He has problems in his life that he can't deal with and convinced himself we were never going to work out because he felt I deserved better than him. He ignored me because he felt it was the best way to end it without confrntation, but he was wrong because I was left very confused. He told me when I saw him that he has serious money problems and can't feel secure knowing he has nothing to build a future. What hurts is that I never asked him for anything, I look after myself, but may be I made him feel he wasn't needed by me. Millions of questions go through my head, every day, but I still don't try to call, because if he wants me, he knows I'm there, and I can't force him to want me. I know how much you miss your ex. It feels like no-one else will ever be the same for you. But life throws the most unexpected pain at us and we have to find the strength to cope. Train yourself to not call him, you will only make him and yourself feel worse. I'm better now than I was at the beginning, in dealing with the hurt, so may be time really does heal. I tell myself I have to have self-respect and not call him when he's shut me out like that. I have my pride, even though I'm suffering inside and wish this had never happened. The Original Question and RomanceClass Answer
|