Is it about time I give up?We often have visitors write in with solutions to each others' problems. Here is a visitor's solution to one of our visitor's questions. Original Visitor's Question from a 13-20 year old Male I hope you can imagine how desperate it becomes, when it gets to a high schooler asking this kind of a question. But it's like this: we're both sophomores, and we went out for a good couple of months. she decided, finally, that she had to break it off with me, and that I shouldn't ask why. I didn't ask why... I confessed that I still had feelings for her two months later, and she hesitated before shooting me down again. I'm guessing the third time isn't the charm in this case, and I should just give up, but I can't find away to rid my feelings of her. I guess I never found closure, but she hasn't shown any signs that she wants to get back with me, and she equally doesn't try to freeze me out. I'm not sure what to do. I've tried concentrating on everything I hate about her, but the only thing is that she complains too much, and she doesn't even complain as much as any of the other girls I know. And every time, right when I think I'm over her, I see her, and the feelings come back stronger than ever. Homecoming is coming up. the only thing I can think about, is that I'd hate it if a guy asked her out. I guess I'm a bit ambivalent about this situation: I want her back, but I'm sure she'll just shoot me down again, and I don't want to lose anymore than I've already lost with her. But it's the same problem... I don't know how to get over her. sincerely yours, Frantic and Confused User Submitted Advice from a 31-40 year old Female focus on here and now It doesn't seem fair that she wouldn't allow you to ask the whys..from the above it seemed as tho she hasn't exactly closed the door on you. Maybe she's not 100% in there never being a you and her again. If this isn't the reason then I would think that she is being selfish. This would be something to think of while trying to get over her. Often enough we seem to want with all that we are something that we can not have. The old saying goes set if free, if it's meant to be, it will return to thee. You can't live on the hopes that you'll be a couple again. It's harmful to your well being to continue to focus on what is not in the here and now. I would hope that you would focus on other aspects in your life or create new ideals to get involved with. It's difficult to lose someone you care about but there is truth in that time heals all wounds...this doesn't mean that you won't always feel something for her. Just that it won't hurt you to think about her and what she means to you. Speaking from experience...but we most follow our own paths in life and learn these lessons on are own. Be well The Original Question and RomanceClass Answer
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