we kissed and we both agreed that the spark was still there.

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Visitor's Question:
Hi,

8 months ago I split from my partner of 4 years and I am now seeing someone else.
However my ex has just burried his mother and seeing him recentley made all my old feelings come back. After the funeral we kissed and we both agreed that the spark was still there.

I want him back but I dont want to rush him and i dont want to hurt the man that i am seeing now.

Please help I have never felt so overwhelmed by anything before




Our Suggestion:
The spark may very well still be there, it usually is. BUT all those old problems and reasons you left before are also still there. Nothing has changed, you haven't worked through the breakup issues, and if you were to rejoin him, things would revert to where you'd left off and you'd be fighting over who should take out the trash, all over again. Before you go rushing back to him, make sure that it is something worth going back to.

As for what you do with the new guy, it depends on how deep things are. If you're just dating, there's nothing saying you can't date your ex- at the same time. If this is a closer relationship, then you might want to talk with him and say that you want to back things off for a while to make sure it's the right thing. Then go to a good councellor and work out which guy is better for you in the long run.

Falling into your ex-'s arms immediately does not seem to be the right answer. It would be all romance and sparkles for a while but it would devolve into the same old stuff. Be careful how you proceed.

Good luck!

--Jenn



--Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com




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