everything was perfect until i got a new job

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Visitor's Question:
i love my boyfriend. i really do. we have a really special relationship where we know eachother inside and out. everything was perfect until i got a new job. i was working more hours so instead of seeing me, he would spend more time with his friends, which im completely fine with. but one day he told me he was going to the pub with his best friend. i got home from work to find out from a good friend that she'd seen him with his arm around another girl. this girl looks alot like me, and is actually a friend of mine and his best friend.
when i asked him about it, he explained it was just becuase she was drunk. but the fact was hed lied to me about who he was actually going out with that day.
after about 2 weeks we broke up. he appologised and i said it might take a little while for me to trust him again.
i brought this up a few times recently and he is adamant it was purely a friendly thing he did, nothing sexual about it. i realise that theres no need to keep bringing it up because it'll just cause too much trouble. i dont want to lose him, and i dont think he would cheet on me. but everytime he goes anywhere without me i worry what he's getting up to.




Our Suggestion:
Your normal reaction of worry is going to harm your relationship unless you get it under control. From what you say, he said he was going with his best friend, and then you say that she's a friend of yours and his best friend. So maybe you thought he meant one person and he really meant her. Whatever happened, you're worried that he'll lie or cover up again and you'll be the fool for not seeing it ahead of time.

Relationships require faith and trust. Your trust in him has been shaken, but it's not broken. So bring up the faith in him and when you wonder and feel that twang of unhappiness, tell yourself that you have faith in him and in his responsibility toward your relationship. Things will come around.

I wish you the best!

--Jenn



--Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com




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