The spark is dying

Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Male
My girlfriend is not being very affectionate to me anymore. We don't have very intimate moments anymore and a lot of times doesn't want me to kiss her. But then she tells me she loves me and when I am not around she gets upset I am not around. When we are away from eachother she sends me text messages or calls me a lot. I try to make things interesting in our love life but it becomes hard when you are the only one putting effort. We haven't had sex in a while either. Then out of nowhere she will want to kiss me, but not often and I will be told that she loves me but again, not very often. I don't know what to do anymore. Our romance is not the same anymore and I want to rekindle it. Any advice would be welcome. Advice
This is a good opportunity for you to have a long, gentle, conversation.

Explain to her how you feel and find out how she feels. Maybe she has the feeling that everytime there is affection that you want it to lead to sex. And that is probably true since you aren't getting much.

Perhaps you could figure out some system where you would both get what you need. For example she may only want sex once a month then you could compromise and make it once every three weeks. Your circumstances are probably different but you could still work out a solution.

If this was the problem, the new understanding may change the affection to what you want.

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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