a year and some months later

Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
I still have feelings for my ex girlfriend, we were together for about as long as we have been broken up now (1yr and some months). Her and I have been in low contact for pretty much this entire time and 3 months ago I finally told her not to contact me anymore and that I would contact her if I ever felt ready to talk to her again (its a whole huge story by itself so I wont go into that). I just contacted her again last week, we had a good phone conversation (lasted 40min), im surprised how well the conversation went actually, the only ackward part was when I asked her to lunch to catch up a little more and she mentioned that her boyfriend might not like that, so I told her that I will call her later this week and figure out a possible day to meet..(who knows what will happen)

She had a boyfriend when I cut contact with her and appearently she has dumped him but has a new boyfriend of 2 months now(he lives in another state though so they hardly see eachother..maybe 2 or 3 times MAX). I plan on telling her in person (hopefully she agrees to lunch this upcoming saturday) that I want to be friends with her again and to put the past away, the problem is that I do still have some feelings for her and would like to be back together. She was my first love and im pretty sure that I was for her too, if anything I was the longest relationship she has ever had so there must be something...Is it too late to have her possibly come back? Im not sure what I should do to bring back her attraction towards me..I know she is with another guy but it seems like she is still trying to find a replacement for me.. I dont want to get myself all caught up over her but I would like to try and see if there is something that could develop once again. I dont want to rush anything either and that could cause problems.

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RomanceClass.com Advice
You seem to have a good plan in mind.

Try for that lunch and see if you can develop friendship again. It won't be easy since she has a boyfriend. And, you certainly shouldn't try to come between her and her boyfriend.

Just be a vibrant, interesting personality and she may find you attractive again. Be yourself, but subtly emphasize how you are taking care of yourself both physically, emotionally, and intellectually. Everyone respects people like that.

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com

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