I'm tired of feeling so jealous-please help!

Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Female
Me and my boyfriend have been together for almost 4 years now. We're both juniors in college. I love him, and I know he loves me very much. we've even talked about marriage someday. In the past there have been incidents when I know he hasn't cheated on me, but he wasn't completely honest right away. Once a girl told someone I know that she was dating him. He said she had been stalking him and trying to get with him. Another time a drunk girl climbed into his bed and tried to do stuff with him, but he made her leave.

These situations aren't completely his fault, but lately I've been feeling more and more jealous and insecure. I used to look through his phone, but I've tried really hard to stop because I know it upsets him. I don't think he would ever cheat intentionally, but I worry something could happen if he was drunk. Even if he just goes to hang out with friends, I wonder if there will be girls there and if they will try to flirt with him or worse. I think part of the insecurity comes from the fact that he's the only guy I've ever been intimate with. Also, I sometimes wonder if we should date other people before settling down. How can I stop feeling so jealous? (By the way, I tried to read your tips on this but nothing came up, so sorry if this is a repeat question!)

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RomanceClass.com Advice
Since you are wondering whether you should date other people, I think that is the first question to resolve which might relieve the jealousy.

Make up your mind if you can. Then talk with him about it-- one way or the other. It isn't unusual for a person to want more experience, especially when the partner already has it. If this is the root of your jealousy, it would be good to get rid of the cause.

Perhaps you are worried that he wants more experience too.

Think about these things and see how that affects the jealosy.

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com

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