I feel disappointed

Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Male
She's been a close friend for ages. She only visits my city every several months and we only communicate when she's here, and when she's away I always miss her a lot (as a friend). I started to think about her more and more. Several months ago, we kissed on one of our meetings. We started to communicate even when she's away, online and by phone. A month ago she stopped responding to my calls and emails. I stopped trying to contact her after two weeks... The reason I have so much affection for her is because I think she has a good heart and I can trust her with anything... So, as far as I know her she wouldn't 'play games' with any guy. Starting to think maybe she got bored of me, or wasn't interested in me but didn't want to hurt my feelings/ whatever.

That was okay. I managed that fine because I felt she was protecting me, and I started looking for other dates.

Then out of the blue I get an email from her saying she went on holidays and she was so sorry for not replying me so long, and she hasn't been online for ages plus other random chitchat as if everything's dandy fine.

But I'm sitting here and thinking "Couldn't she have called me or emailed me before she left? Why didn't I ever hear of her plans? Or am I just a totally unimportant friend she couldn't be bothered?".... I'm so confused I don't know what to say back to her. From my experience of dates with other girls it totally seems like she was playing/testing me. And if she was just another girl I met, it'd have been okay, but she's a really really close friend and I'm really disappointed and hurt when I think about it. :(

I'd have asked my best friend but he'd just say follow my heart (and it works very well in all kinds of situations). Buh my heart is confused and I don't know what to follow.

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RomanceClass.com Advice
Something came into her life that interfered with her relationship with you. Perhaps it was someone else.

You could express your surprise that she hadn't kept you informed and tell her that you were worried and, in fact, hurt that you couldn't reach her. Then leave it up to her to explain or not.

These things happen in life. Glitches. You try to figure them out but if you can't, and you like the other person enough you move ahead and try to restore what you had.

I don't think she was testing you... it just doesn't fit with your relationship.

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com

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