He's Taken - I Chase Him Anyway

Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Female
There's this guy, and he's my best friend. I really like him and I might be in love with him but, I'm not very sure what he feels toward me. I act like I don't like him that way, like he's my brother.

Well, him and I hang out pretty much all the time. We walk together between classes and we even spend lunch together sometimes. Although he has a girlfriend that he says he loves me. He's also a really big flirt. Whenever he's with another girl I get kinda jealous.

I started calling him my brother and I even say I love him everyday. Although he does say it back (because I'll keep saying it until he says it back) I don't know if he does feel that way. I tell him everything and he tells me (almost) everything.

He makes me laugh whenever I'm sad or mad, he helps me with whatever I need, he makes sure I'm safe, he treats me differently than the other girls but it also seems like he only does that because he wants to be nice.

Please help answer my question. Thank you!




RomanceClass.com Advice
This guy in question has a girlfriend. So what is your aim? To prove that he can be unfaithful to his girlfriend? To prove that he's the type of guy who will give up on a girlfriend if another girl flirts with him enough? In that case, are you ever going to be secure with him if he does become YOUR boyfriend? Or will you constantly worry that he's just a day away from having some other girl flirt with him enough to lure him away from you?

If you honestly care for this guy then I would back off on the relationship-breaking activity. Not only is it not good for him, but it's not good for you either. Few women want a woman around who is known to chase after taken boyfriends. Imagine if you and he were dating. Would you want a girl constantly chasing him, a girl who was known to steal boyfriends away? It's a very black cloud to have hanging over one's head.

Yes, be his friend. Yes, be there for him. Yes, let him know you care. It's one thing to be a loyal friend. It's another to actively push people into destroying their relationships. It's an important line to figure out.

Good luck.

-- from Lisa
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com





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