Breaking Up Because of School

Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Male
Well I was with this girl for 6 months. We split up and she really couldn't tell me the truth why. I think she was afraid of hurting my feelings. Anyways, It's been about a month and a half and were starting to talk again. I was talking to her friend and she asked her why she broke up and she said because she didn't want a boyfriend going into college.

I was thinking real hard and the moment that we even thought of break up was because of school. So I figured that she just wants to get adjusted to a new school. School is really important to her.

So my questions are does this kind of thing happen alot? And What do you do in these situations? Do you give it time and space and wait to see what happen? What Is usaully the outcome of these break ups? Advice
Yes this happens ALL the time. It is very, very common for teenagers who go off to college, finally free of parents and "old expectations", finally able to do what they want, when they want, with whoever they want, to desire that freedom and not want any ties.

Yes, after a few months some people realize that acting crazy just isn't as much fun as it was made out to be, and get back in touch with old girlfriend/boyfriends to rebuild that relationship. Others find a new partner who is much more in tune with their new, maturing personality, and are happier that way. The best thing you can do is stay friends with her and always be there for her. If you guys were meant to be, she'll come back to you after she gets that rush of freedom out of her system. If you just weren't that close or well matched for each other, it's likely she'll find someone better matched, but then again so will you, and you can still be great friends.

I have lots of tips on the site for maintaining a long distance relationship, so read through those and keep in touch with her!

-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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