The Cruise Ship Romance

Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
I have a problem on how to get someone back, because I think she still likes me and I still like her, our situation is a bit different from other ones Iíve read.

I was recently in Paris on a college trip, the first night there we went to a bar, and me and a girl from my art classes really hit it off, we really got on well and ended up in my hotel room, (we didnít have sex because I thought it wouldn't be fair since both of us had a lot to drink, and she didnít mind not having sex) anyway she stayed with me through the night.

The next morning we were really close and she hang at my room, we were practically a couple through the day, and we relay got close in the 3 days we were there, maybe we got close too quickly! Anyway on the way back out of the blue she broke it off, (saying she doesnít want to lead me on) and we decided to be friends! The trip back was great we joked around had a few drinks like friends do; we had a fun time on the way back! As we were leaving the coach she gave me a hug and a kiss on the cheek good-bye and we went separate ways home.

I really like this girl, I think sheís amazing!!! And really down to earth, someone thatís hard to find and really suits me! And I really want to get back together with her, one of my friends said they think sheís the kind of girl you got to get to know first! And I think she still likes me.

The following week in college we smiled at each other and said hi when we saw, and I talked to her a bit. Then we had a weeks break from college, and I hadnít seen her or heard from her at all, and I thought I got over her. Then yesterday I went up to the art department with one of my cute female friends, and we were talking and joking while I was cutting some stuff up. I had my back to the entrance when the girl from the trip walked in, she went to her desk which was just behind me, I looked back to see who walked in and it was her (and I realised I wasnít over her at all!), but she was acting as if she didnít see me, and was kind of looking away not to look at me, I wanted to say hi, but it was kind of awkward as she didnít look my way. And she left quickly as my head was turned away. (I think she was a bit jealous because I was with this cute girl when she walked in, and I think she wanted me to act first, I donít know why I didnít?) But my problem is, I donít know how to go about talking to her, and it seams real hard, every time see her its hard and I donít know why it should be because we had a fun time on the trip, and on the coach on the way back, and now we are hardly saying a word!

If I canít get her back as a girlfriend, I donít just want to loose her as a friend completely, because when I was around her it felt like I was with a really good friend! Advice
The situation you were in is called a "cruise ship romance" - it's when you're away from your normal life, in a fun, exotic location, and you do wild, fun things with people because you are in a fantasy world. Then when you return to your normal life, you return to your normal life and ways and those vacation times seem VERY far away.

OK so now you start again with normal flirting -

chat with her, say hi, find ways to just chat with her. The more you do, the more you will reconnect as a normal friend in her normal world!

-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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