He's Slime and he Wants to Stick Around

Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
MY EX BOYFRIEND IS AND MANIPUTIVE LYING CHEATING DOG BUT HE STILL WANTS TO BE IN HIS SON'S LIFE BUT HE DOESNT TAKE CARE OF HIM AND HE IS VERY ABUSIVE EMOTIONALLY AND HE DOESNT CARE ABOUT ME NOR MY SON WHAT DO I ?

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RomanceClass.com Advice
It sounds like he treats you and your son more as possessions and as "look! I made a kid!" than something to actually care for. Definitely your health and happiness are very important to your son, you need to be there, fully happy and productive and health in order to properly care for him. So anything your ex does to harm that is harming your son too.

When people break up, they work out arrangements for seeing the children that are involved. This happens to millions of people out there, so your situation is very common. Yes, he should be able to see his son. But no, he should not be able to harm you or his son. So work out a compromise. This could involve him taking his son on alternate weekends. It could involve him seeing his son but only at his mother's house or somewhere else where there is a third party involved. It could even involve him coming to spend time with his son once a week, where the two of them play in another room and you stay away but within earshot.

Whatever you decide to do, make sure it protects you and your son, but also gives your ex his right to see his child. It could be that once he realizes he can see his son but can't hurt you, that he's just not interested any more.

If you have trouble coming to an agreement, there are thousands of moderators out there who specialize in this. Talk to one and get it resolved, so it doesn't harm you or your son but allows your son's father a decent chance of making it work, if he really wants it to.

-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com

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