He Leads On His Female Friend

Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Female
I can't stop from feeling angry and jealous of my boyfriend's older, not unattractive female friend! They've been friends a long time, she totally has feelings for him, and he knows it. They always "harmlessly flirt" and talk about their love lives and stuff, and they work together! I hate thinking about the two of them, and my boyfriend thinks I am silly and that I need to get over it. It is more of an annoying feeling when I see them, it's like they're best buds and he totally leads her on just for the kick of it, and I can't stop it!! PLEASE HELP ME!

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RomanceClass.com Advice
On one hand, jealousy will eat you up - you really need to get a good handle on it. I have a ton of tips and even an ebook and quiz on the topic, so be sure to work on this very deliberately. Hundreds of people have written in to me whose relationships were destroyed by jealousy.

That being said, it is always the responsibility of a friend to treat a friend with respect. That is - your boyfriend should be treating his female friend with respect. He KNOWS she likes him - and he deliberately goads her into believing they can have something more. That is incredibly unfair. He does it to boost his own ego. He feels he can keep her at a safe distance. But how about her? She LIKES him. She keeps thinking she might get him! He is engaging in long drawn out torture, because she isn't going to move on and find a free, real man for herself as long as she thinks this guy might be there for her.

If he REALLY is a friend to her, he'll draw back so that she moves on to someone else. The longer she spends all her attentions on him, the older she gets, the more opportunities she is going to miss. That's really very selfish of him, to do that to her.

-- from Lisa
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com

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