He's a Casual Boyfriend

Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Female
Ok well me and my boyfriend just got together but he doesn't really call me and everytime i call him after a little while he has to go. At school everything is fine the thing is that he only gives me a peck. We only french kissed once. Is something wrong w/ the things he is doing. What's really going to on?

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RomanceClass.com Advice
It sounds like you guys skipped the friendship step of becoming boyfriend/girlfriend!! You should always be friends first so you're already comfortable talking together, being together, know each other pretty well, understand each other, and have that base built up. Instead it sounds like you lept into dating but weren't friends first, and now don't know how to do those normal friendship things that are so key in any relationship.

So you have to back-fill. You have to learn to be friends. Ask him to call you! Talk about things he'd be interested in when you call him. Tell him funny stories about what you've done during the day. Ask him questions about his childhood. Ask him what his favorite movie was when he was little. Go to movies together, Go to the mall together, hang out together. All those things that friends do and talk about to get more comfortable with each other.

A relationship is NOT about how much or little sexual contact goes on. Maybe he's just not into kissing! One of the keys to any relationship is that it should not have pressure in that area. So keep up with the normal hugging I assume you do, and the gentle kisses goodbye. If that's what he's happy with, then that's what he enjoys. All sexual contact is a mutual sign of affection between the two. So appreciate what he does feel comfortable with, and it probably will increase over time. If you try to *push* him into more, you're violating the trust in the relationship, and could likely cause an abrupt end to it.

-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com

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