She's in love

Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Female
okay i cannot even EXPLAIN to you my feelings for this guy. other than that i am totally in LOVE with him. I've known his since i moved to illinois. We've always had a good friendship. And i have ALWAYS had this thing for him. I mean I've had good relatioships with other people. But I've still always had this thing for him. And I realized at the beginning of my sophmore year in highschool that i love him. When i see him my heart pounds. I would do ANYTHIHNG just to even SEE him. I love the feeling, but i dont love that we're not together. We have had many many sexual conversations, just about how we're very physically attracted to eachother, but we've never actually DONE anything together(sexually). he is a senior in higschool this year while im a sophmore. a girl in his class(a senior)is always all over him. i dont think he likes her, but she asked him to the vice versa dance and they went together which i think brought them closer as friends. but made HER like HIM even more. She is going to the U of I next year and he is going to charleston university which is about two hours away from me. he told me he will visit me alot. and how he'll want me to come visit. we've even talked about him moving in with me if he couldnt find a place to stay ( but i doubt that would happen). I just love him soooooo much. He doesnt know this though. I think he thinks i just mess with him and stuff. I mean, I think he thinks im attracted to him only in a physical way. Im scared to tell him how i feel. i dont know HOW to tell him how i feel. and im scared that if i DID tell him, and the feeling wasnt mutual, it wouldnt ruin our friendship. and the thought of me not even having him as a friend (the way we are now)....the thought is unbearable. I just dont know what to do. PLEASE give me advise. I am in love...and i dont want it to go to waste. I want something to happen. This is the kind of love where I actually want to spend the rest of my life with him.
Thank you. Advice
You are right, you don't want to risk ruining your friendship by jumping on him and yelling "I LOVE YOU!!!!" :-)

But there are more subtle ways of raising the topic. Think over something like this: "I think I am beginning to develop feelings for you." If he doesn't respond immediately, give him a week and then bring the subject again by asking him if he has thought about what you said to him.

From all of what you have told me, my guess is that he will also admit to having feelings for you. Sure hope so!

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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