Still loves ex who has a new girl
Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old FemaleMy relationship with my past partner occurred for 4 years (we use to live with each other and knew each other for 6 we were each others first for everything even friends), toward the end of our relationship both of us started to make mistakes. Our friends began to become too involved and influencing the situation to much. I'm not blaming him for what happened because this is a 50/50 relationship, but first my best friend had called him and they "talked" about a potential relationship, so I had no where to turn so I started talking to his best friend, and finally we broke up. I was devastated and had no one to turn to so I continued talking to my ex best friend and I started to become close, his best friend and I had kissed and at that point I knew it had gone to far I loved my ex with all my heart and I wanted to be with him for the rest of my life. We had been broken up for 2months (after begging,etc I decided to let fate take its course) we both had separate lives and then we met up again we talked for hours just as if we were dating and then we started kissing and moving on to more, we told each other we were both still very much in love and that it would work out but we needed to give it time (at this time he had been dating another girl). So a week later I had wrote him a letter and finally without any responses went over he reacted and said that I had planned all of this to happen just to break up his current relationship, and try to ruin his "new life" which was untrue and he only expected this because I had told my brother the situation for advice and so my ex was afraid of the consequences. Now we aren't seeing each other anymore and we cant trust each other I'm trying to be happy but its very difficult without him, I wouldn't try and would just give up but I can honestly say he is the "one", he's tired of hearing that I love him and talking about our problems now I don't know what to do yes we are young and naive, but everyday he asks people how I'm doing what I'm doing and I know( and looks at me just as he use to) he still loves me. But what should I do how do I become close again he doesn't want a friendship because he says he cannot trust me, or thinks Im trying to ruin his "new life"? Also why is it that he's bringing up extremely old issues that I tried already discussing but wont? It's also hard for me as well, Im willing to work on this and I know he is as well. I understand my mistakes and want to learn from them but if I give this to much time then we will slowly drift father apart and if I don't give him enough he will get angry. This obviously is a huge lack of communication but its like whenever we do get to see each other now alone nothing else matters we to busy hanging out and catching up. Please help me and forgive my improper grammar!
RomanceClass.com AdviceYour best chance is to start being friends again.
You've tried this in the past and it didn't work, but you have to make it work this time. Work on that hot temper of yours... it is putting up a big wall between you and your ex.
Think before you say something to him. Help him trust and respect you again by being consistently truthful with him.
This should help. I hope so!
George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com
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