Shy and lonely in Deutschland

Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Female
I'm kind of embarassed, cause almost everyone who posted have problems with girls/boys. My problem is that I feel lonely but I think it's my own fault. Well, I don't like going to party's and I'm really shy when i happen to meet new people. i always check the people I meet, if I don't know what to say and the person doesn't either then I tell myself: Ok, don't be upset, you just don't get along. you know there are persons that I just get along with, almost from the beginning. I hope you get what I mean.
So I end up in my room, listening to (sometimes) romantic songs..and I just get sad.
Sometimes I think that the TV spoiled me, you know about realtionships and everything. I just have the feeling that I'll never find somebody that I'm going to love, because I always feel under pressure.
Mind my english, I'm from germany, although it would be really nice if you could help me out!!
Thank you very much!!
P.S. I'm sorry this is quite long.. Advice
Your English is perfect! Maybe you should come to the US and look for boys :)

Seriously though, we get many letters from young men and women describing how shy they are and they don't know how to approach the opposite sex.

The trick is to realize that you only have one life to live and you better get out there and do it!

Look around you, there are many guys who have nobody and would be delighted to be with you. You need to overcome your shyness about making casual conversation. If you are in school, join clubs or sports and meet guys that way. If you are at work, then make small talk with guys.

You can't use the excuse of shyness forever. Talk about anything (imagine how many millions of topics there are to discuss with anew person). Talk about the weather, about flowers, about hobbies, music, school, your family, parties,
sports, your computer, online experiences, cars, future plans, your family tree (don't laugh, it's interesting). If you are shy, make that the topic of conversation.

So don't hang back from life but embrace it!

Good luck,

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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