Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
My Finance checked out of Phoenix recovery center about 3 weeks ago. We moved quickly to get a place together as soon as she checked out. Which I realize goes against everything she learned as far as making big decisions.
Previously to her checking into rehab we had just gotten back together after a 9 month separation in which time she was dating her dealer. Her drug or variable was marijuana, which had afflicted her life long before I met her. We have been on and off for about three years, and our relationship has been put through a battery of lies. I know I care deeply for her, but have learned she lies pathologically. She is a former prostitute and fear that in relapsing she will return back to that type of work.

Currently I have no idea what my next step should be. I had moved out yesterday under the impression that we were moving too fast and made a mistake moving in together too soon. It was supposed to be for the greater good of our relationship. I was not the one who initiated that decision. It only came about after I had confronted her about discovering phone calls and e-mail were being exchanged between her and the drug dealer ex bf. She said that it made her feel uncomfortable that i snooped and that we need to take things slow in order to make the most of it. Last night I went back as a result of a gut feeling and discovered that he was at the apartment.

I don’t know what to do, I know I care about her, I have no idea how to help her. Is it even worth it, or will I just continue to get hurt. I realize that isn’t something that you can absolutely tell me.

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RomanceClass.com Advice
We are not professional counselors, and I think you need to talk with one.

Get your local phonebook and find some numbers to call.

If you can't afford a counselor, here is a webpage with free help centers:

http://www.mentalhealth.samhsa.gov/hotlines/default.asp

My advice about the girl is to dump her... she is untrustworthy and will only give you pain... do you want that for the rest of your life?

Good luck!
George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com

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