Some comments on arguments from elsewhere:

Originally Posted By: Carl
..

I agree about the communication. I remember when Marge and I had our first "shouting" discussion. I have a long-term (from childhood issues) fear of abandonment, so I tended to avoid disagreements and would hold things inward until they blew, and then all the festering stuff would come out - out of proportion to the incident at hand.

Suddenly, as we were in the midst of the "discussion" (okay, we were arguing), we both suddenly started laughing. We knew we were not going to end a relationship that satisfied us both so much, and we knew we would work it out, so we did. Marge has helped me to see that just because you expose your feelings, it doesn't mean that everything has to end.

I remember an anecdote I read about a couple who would postpone arguments until they could be alone and nude/naked. Hard to stay angry when there are other emotions rising and hormones stirring.

From my first two marriages, I can attest to how much financial worries can negatively affect a relationship. But, I now see that even then, you can survive and even grow stronger when you communicate honestly and lovingly.

...



Originally Posted By: victor
... we have our differences - tastes in books, movies, humor - but nothing that screams out "CONFLICT". It just makes for smooth sailing.
We do have very occasional arguments, but it is usually about a transient event or misunderstanding, and not about anything I would consider "fundamental." We have no recurring arguments i.e. about the same topic or theme- which in my experience is a relationship killer.



http://www.wineintro.com/forum/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=162611&page=1#Post162611


"The secret of success is constancy to purpose" - Benjamin Disraeli.