I've met a nice guy since the beginning of August. We're both college students going to the same University in New York but currently studying abroad in Rome, Italy. He majors in architecture while I in fine arts. However, it wasn't until this semester that I met him for the first time.
To describe him, I would have to say he is very intelligent and knowledgeable while also being extremely quiet! It's not even that he doesn't talk. When he does talk, it's so difficult to even hear what he's saying because he speaks so softly. Rarely would I ever see him hanging around with friends. Whenever we go on field trips around Italy, I always see him just walking by himself with his camera. He's very friendly however when one does approach him. In fact, I don't think I've ever seen him not smile at someone he's talking to. After the first month or so of knowing him, I've decided that he's simply a shy guy.
All semester I've been trying to get to know him by talking to him every once in a while. I asked him to be my partner for practicing for our Italian oral midterm, sat with him during lunch when we visited Hadrian's Villa, and even invited him to my apartment for a birthday celebration for a friend of mine. Yet, he still stayed inside that shell of his. He'd never be the first to speak to me.
However sometimes, I feel like he's interested when he always walks near me.. but never right next to me. There was a time when we both silently ended up walking in a garden together during one of our school trips. It wasn't planned, but we just both found ourselves there. We said "hello" to each other.. and just went about our ways of taking in the view while exploring the area. Strangely, he was always a few steps away from me when there were millions of directions he could've taken. This lasted for an hour before we had to head back.
Another example of when I felt he might have been interested was during a reception our school held for a Roman artist. All the faculty and students were there, where food and drinks were served. My friends and I went downstairs to our studio space, where the artist was supposed to advise us on our works while the majority of the people stayed upstairs. After two hours or so, I decided to head back up to get a drink before leaving for home. I noticed that everyone was already leaving by that time, including him (my love interest) who was walking outside the door. I was waiting outside the door, waiting for an opportunity to get inside as people were coming out of the doorway in masses. When he reached the door, he stopped walking and just smiled at me to let me get by. I walked in quickly and went straight to the drinks area in a flushed state. When i turned around, the room was pretty empty.... and to my surprise, he was still at the doorway just standing by himself. I walked toward him, hoping to at least say a "hello" and smile before walking out again. Unfortunately, he never made eye contact with me even when I was walking past him. I ended up walking outside disappointed only to suddenly see him walking behind me toward the direction of his apartment as well. He walked up to me and finally said "hi". Since our apartments were in the same direction, we walked home together that night.
The semester is now coming to an end, and my friends have advised me to just tell him how i feel before we all leave for the states. This is because I most likely won't see him again when we get back, since we are in different majors, taking different classes. He's also in his last year and will graduate in the spring. Last Saturday on our last school field trip to Naples, I finally told him in the most awkward and nervous way possible that I liked him. To give you an idea, this was how the conversation went pretty much word by word:
3-4 minutes of talking have passed..
Me: So.. can i ask you a question?
Him: Sure
Me (very very nervous): Uhm.. I think you're really nice, and I really like you. I was wondering if you want to hang out sometime..
(silence...)
Him: ok
Me: really?
Him: yea sure
Me: so.. is there any place specific that you'd like to go around Rome?
Him: I don't know. I don't really go out much.
Me: oh.. I don't either really. Have you heard of any place that you think would be a good place to visit?
Him: How about let's go to dinner?
Me: Yea, that'll be nice actually.
(We've now reached the bus, and our conversation must come to an end.)
Me: When and where do you want to go?
Him: I'm not sure, but we'll figure something out.
Through all of that, he never really smiled like he would normally. This worries me... and I've been wondering if he only said "yes" because he didn't know how to reject a girl or didn't want to hurt her feelings. 3 days passed before we talked again, when we had to meet for our Italian class. All class period, he avoided eye contact with me. Our instructor asked us to sit next to each other for a class exercise, and i could tell it was ridiculously awkward for both of us. when class ended, he got up and left without saying a word to me. 2 days ago, I saw him alone in the library. He looked up from his book and said hi to me. I said hello back and saw him going back to reading his book. I was pretty frustrated at the moment. I walked out only to walk back in three minutes later to say...
Me: Do you still want to go to dinner sometime?
Him: Sure
Me: When are you free?
Him: I'm pretty busy these days actually... with finals coming up
Me: Oh.. Why don't you e-mail me when you're free then, and we could set up a time.
Him: ok
Then I left the room. I pretty much take what he said as a rejection. I guess it frustrates me a bit when he could've said "no" to me when I asked him to go out the first time. Why say "yes" only to avoid the girl afterwards? Isn't that just sending mixed signals? I know he's awkward. I know he's shy. But what's he's doing is very painful for me. It was my first time ever being the first to tell a guy that i liked him. I can't describe how nervous I was to go up to him and tell him how I felt, and how ecstatic I was when he suggested dinner. I was also really proud of myself however for doing what I did and putting myself out there to achieve what I wanted. Being a shy girl myself, it's amazing how hard i tried with him. Yet, his reactions to all makes me feel like I'm a fool doing what i did. There are friends of mine who still thinks that this is just him being shy and awkward, while most feel that this is his way of rejecting me. What do you guys think?
Sorry for this long post...
