Hi again

I think that you should just start again from here and see what happens, making sure that you only do what you really feel comfortable doing, so that you feel happier with yourself and your actions.
I am a traditional person, too, from a traditional family with traditional values (much older than you though

). I think that this is fine, but it can sometimes make us very hard on ourselves and I even think that it can lead to stress and depression in certain circumstances.
Good luck
