Tales of the Ex @ RomanceClass -
An Affair with a Twist

Last summer my boyfriend and I broke up because I was cheating. The funny thing is, I was the last person to know I was cheating! About a year and a half ago we both decided he should move down south to me closer to his rental properties while I stayed behind up north to save our home from forclosure. I would follow as soon as that was secured. We talked daily at first and traveled back and forth as often as we could until it became too expensive. Add to that, his finacial problems in the south were surmounting and communication between us fell short due to depression and finacial fustrations. I flew down a couple of times early last year and spent time with him and everything seemed ok except I had this sinking feeling that something had changed about him and he wasn't being truthful with me. In May of that year I couldn't get in touch with him for a week and I had a vauge explanation for it. I mutual friend of ours in the south called me in July and told me he that word was we had broken up over my "cheating". He had been seeing someone else since the previous Fall season and worst, he was engaged to get married, which was this past December. I was enraged of course and confronted him with the information. He confessed, but said the marriage was for financial security and comfort, not love. He said he had heard stories about me messing around and thought it best not to confront but to quietly move on. I called him a liar and a cheat and told him he himself made that up to give him an excuse because he had become selfish and couldn't keep it in his pants and wait for me. He tried to stick to the accusations about my cheating. I disspelled the lie and showed proof that I had not been unfaithful. For about a month after, I wouldn't speak to him except for matters of the house I was now living in alone. He said I could have it after he secured the loan. I told him communication between us would only be as tenant and landlord. But after awhile I realized I just couldn't get him out of my head or heart. One day he called and asked how I was doing. I said I was still hurting but I wasn't angry anymore. I went on to confess that I still loved him and valued our friendship. After a few more canvassing calls back and fourth, he confessed that he had made a huge mistake in jugdement about me but that it was just the excuse to marry a woman who had used marriage as a condition of a much needed loan to pay off property taxes on his rental properties. The terms wereto either pay her back by December last year or marry her or be sued for everything he had. I understood his dilemma and forgave him. He said he still loved me and didn't want to truly lose me. We got together one more time just before the two more times before the wedding and re-established our bonds. Now, as it is the new year, we've been talking on the phone, texting and emailing each other everyday, without fail. He has booked a flight for February to spend a week with me, using visiting his family as an excuse. His relationship with his "wife" is virtually sexless. I know this because he talks to me every night from his bed/livingroom couch while she's in bed by 10:30pm sleeping in the bedroom. She can't stand his snoring and he's a night owl who won't sleep until about 3am. He smokes and drinks and likes to have sex every night if he can. She doesn't like any of that. Sex has to be scheduled and has to start from 10:00pm and be over by 10:30pm. He can't wait to see me. We have the whole year scheduled for our visits together. The "wife" suspects he's messing around with someone local and he likes it that way. He says it's a great distraction. He knows that she only wanted to marry him for status with her church and friends. And she seems to like the fact that he stays out of the bedroom and doesn't bother her for sex. He hopes to generate enough money to pay her back with extra and get out of the marriage soon so we can be together again. I'm not sure if I want to believe that but for now I'm just happy to have him when I can and know that he is miserable without me and living in complete hell with her.








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