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On again off again

Ever have that feeling you know that fuzzy feeling you get every time you talk to that special someone or that feeling you get every time you talk to the special some one or the feeling when you are talking to someone and spending time with them and you just want time to freeze well I do well at least I use to know. There was this girl her name was Tatyana and she goes to the same school as I do in the 7th grade she liked me and I didnít I liked someone else so I didnít pay attention to tatyana I practically ignored then for some weird reason we start talking over the summer and I felt like we connected I felt some chemistry we became great friends Ö. You would think that was a good thing if you like the girl but no it was the thing that messed it all up I started 8th grade and I started to like her and I told her that I did she freaked out for like a week and didnít talk to me then she started talking to me again we werenít as good friends as we use to be but you know things happened like I started treating her like s*** and then one day I stopped I felt bad for her and we became ok friends then time went by again almost a whole year and we become great friends and we are having a blast well at least I was and I would tell her almost everyday that I was sorry for treating her bad back then. Until one I started to like her and I did for like a week and she didnít know and I didnít want to tell her cause she liked some other guy so she tells me that she stopped likening him and I take that chance and I tell her my feelings and I ask her out and we go out for like a week and then she said the line that I will never forget she said Ďí Alberto we are always fighting what made you think that going out would make it betteríí than I realized she didnít want to be with which was one of the worst feelings I have ever had she I told her ok fine lets break up so we do. Then the next day we have a talk and I tell her the only reason I broke up with her was because of what she said and then she told me that she didnít mean it that way so we got back together and for 3 hours she had me happy so I could be and then during our lunch she tells me that we should break up and I was surprised and sad at the same time so I decide to say ok and walk away so I walk away and I just couldnít help to feel depressed on the inside we were going out for a week and the happiest moment of that week was the one time we went out when we held hands and she put her head on my shoulder and our eyes met and I just wanted to freeze that moment but I couldnít you know thatís life so after we broke up I was sad as hell then on Saturday April 9th 2005 we got back together which made me sooooo happy inside I felt like I could do anything we went out for 2 weeks we went to the movies and she came to my house and we had fun well at least thatís what I thought then on April 20,2005 she asks me what would I do if she dumped to be with another guy and I said nothing and I thought she was going to dump me but no she didnít in fact we talked later and she told that she loved me just like she had for the past 2 weeks then the next day she tells me that she has to talk to me and she says that she wanted to break up with me and I just died inside I said ok and spent 10 min in my room thinking about what just happened I was thinking that I loved this girl like family I would die for this girl and she told me that she loved me too. I kept thinking about those 4 words she would say I love you to and it killed me inside to find out they were all just lies and a bunch of crap she had made up and I couldnít take it I practically died inside and I donít know what to do now and I have to go to school with her everyday and I donít know if I can take it because I still love that girl.


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