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I loved him with all my heart

Me and my now ex had known each other since year 1 and had been kind of friends on and of.In year 10 i started to like him and want to invite him to things and places but my friends always said why do you want to invite that geek.So I ended up giving up, but then one day at school my best friends tried to set David and me up.At first I was like oh no!!But then I found out he liked me alot to instead of waiting I asked him out.Because we were both new to the dating thing we were very shy and he would always tell me he loved me and was always looking to the future,while I was always to scared to fully give him my whole heart.Anyway, I started talking to this guy on msn and on phone(he lived in Victoria).He became like a best friend and I felt i could tell him everything.I always asked David if it was okay and he always said yes because he didnt mind cause he knew I was the one he loved.David and myself always fought, but we were so close and loved each other so much, we spent every moment school and after school.I loved him with all my heart yet i was still scared to fully accept in my heart how much i needed him in my life.Not long after we had been dating for 8 months I rang him up ..a 3way with my friend...but i was tired and mad at him because I felt he never wanted to ring me.Anyway I said all these nasty horrible things to him,but then I told him how i was just tired and i was sorry and i loved him ..he told me that he loved me heaps and heaps to.Yet 3 days after he rang me up and said that he just wanted to be friends.I was devestated because I loved him so much.Anyway I ended up getting really close to the guy from msn ...because I was so upset and he was there for me.Yet I still knew deep down in my heart that David was the one I loved.The guy form msn came to my hosue all the way from victoria and he stayed with me for two weeks.It was the worse time in my life first it was okay and I kissed him twice, but then the next day i realised how cruel and horrible he was.I was os devestated because I felt that he was the one who assisted with me breaking up with the one i love.So back at school me and David were still friends..but i so badly wanted to holdf him in my arms...and say how sorry I was.I started self cutting because I was so devestated...cause i had lost the love of my life.I wrote him a


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