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Im going to take a chance now.

Howd it all happen? I wasnt expecting that Id end up having my first kiss as well as my first make out session all in one night. I remembered I had a bit to much to drink. My friends wanted the usual long island ice tea in a jug which was cheap but they didnt have it at that time what they did have was the expensive stuff and which I gladly paid for considering I was in a good mood. Anyways when my friends all got a sip of the stuff they all hated it but I was the only one that actually liked the taste. They tried to drink some of it but at the end since I didnt want to waste money I drank practically most of what was in the jug. I felt a bit different after that and I knew that I was drunk but I still knew what was going on around me and I still could think properly and talk normally. Well later we went off to this other place with some couple of other friends of ours. My friends and I went dancing a bit and thats when this guy that I liked came up to me. After dancing a bit too closely thats when I had my first kiss. I dont remember exactly what happened but first thing I saw was that both my friends were making out with the other friends we came with in a corner and I was pulled by the guy I liked to a sofa where he got me to sit on his lap while he held me close to him. Thats when all the making out happened. It felt weird but exciting. We stopped after someone suggested that we all go to this other place. As we went there we held hands but before that I heard some girls calling me a scum and a slut but I didnt know what they were talking about until I heard the thing about the guy's girlfriend. They were in a fight but he as well as his friend said they were over just that the girls didnt get it. I think the guy's ex slapped him on the face that night when he saw me with him... I wasnt there to see it though. It was my first time kissing someone and all of a sudden im being named such bad things. It hurts. He kept reassuring me that nothing is going on with his ex and him and I believed him. For some reason I didnt want the night to end. I never felt so great and care free in my life. He tasted so good and he felt so warm. I loved how he smelt as well. I never imagined that it was going to be like that. When it was almost two I thought we had to stop and call a cab when we had to part it seemed like he didnt want me to go. While waiting for a cab he kept his hand around me or caressed my back gently. It was such a pleasant feeling. When I gave him a hug goodbye he gave me a few more kisses before reluctantly letting me go. When I got home all I thought about was him and what we did. I couldnt sleep for a long time. The next morning images of him kissing me kept coming up in my mind and wouldnt stop and his smell seemed to be a bit on me. I was in a daze. I felt ashamed of my behavior that night but I still dont regret what we did. My first kiss was sweet and I'll never forget it. I like him and I know how very much I want him but still I keep telling myself that it wasnt right... I told him that it was wrong of us to have done that but the truth is Im glad we did. And Im glad that I had my first kiss with him. I need to tell him the truth now and hope he'll understand me. We spoke earlier but I turned him down. How stupid of me... Im going to take a chance now.


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